Both the study and a new film -- "Talk About Kevin" -- raise questions about which comes first: the inability of a mother to show warmth toward the child or the child's inability to bond with the parent.
DelMarVa's Premier Source for News, Opinion, Analysis, and Human Interest Contact Publisher Joe Albero at alberobutzo@wmconnect.com or 410-430-5349
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Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Is It Mom's Fault When Sons Turn Delinquent?
Are teenage boys delinquent because they don't have a close relationship with their mothers, or does a child's character determine how easy it is for a parent to foster warmth and closeness? Is it anyone's fault?A new longitudinal study published this week in the journal Child Development suggests that the mother-son bonds are critical in determining a boy's behavior as a teenager.
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9 comments:
Sure, blame the mothers and treat the fathers like they don't count.
A disservice to all, especially the child.
Mother and father are to blame. When a child is old enough to walk and touch things they are not supposed to touch...they are old enough to know the word "NO". This is the beginning of learning boundries and that there is a price to pay for crossing them. A finder on the back of a hand or a swat on the diaper works well. All of this non-sense about never spanking a child is the ruination of our youth. Spare the rod, spoil the child. If the child doesn't learn boundries (right from wrong) at this point you will never instill them in that child as they grow. It isn't pain that steers the child at this age, as no one should hit a child that young untill it causes pain, it's the discomfort of a less than nurturing experience. One with which they are unfamiliar. It is EVERY parents obligation to teach their child right from wrong. Mother, father, whichever. My mom used to say..."thats why God gave them an ass" The government has no place in determining how I correct my child. Their self imposed existence in that area of the lives of modern families has proven to be a monumental failureas indicated by the increase in juvenile crime.
or it could be just the opposite boys become delinquent b/c they're "a little too close" with their mom.
I question the validity of this one because many things shape a person's behavior --Did this study consider other factors like the child's enviroment????
How does the child spend his freetime? Violent video games??
Income level of parents
Where this child lives and grows up-Inner city vs rural/county.
genetics
The child's type of friends?
How about the fathers behavior and the way he reacts in society??? OR
If there even is a father present.
It all starts at the beginning. Bonding is critical.
While the findings might have some merit, I bet that all of us know two-parent, close-knit families where a child goes wrong. I can think of three right off the top of my head. A Baptist minister and his wife with three sons, who were raised with loving parents, ended up in jail;the other two boys were fine. Another couple, very close to the curch and to each other and very involved with their kids, saw their son in all sorts of trouble, mostly drug-related.The parents did everything they could for the young man, but it was to no avail; the daugher is married and successful Another couple whom I know with one son (adopted)were totally devoted to their son; I understand that he's estranged from them and homeless. In each case, the mother was a constant presence, very nurturing. There are many factors that might have a play in the kids' going wrong. Let's not blame the mothers. In the three cases I cited above, the fathers were all there and very attentive.
perhaps only if she had breast fed
It's the child's fault! No other!
How about the fathers who split? Couldn't possibly take any blame.
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