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Tuesday, June 13, 2017

A.A.A.D.D.- KNOW THE SYMPTOMS!

Thank GOD there's a name for this disorder.

Age-Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. 

This is how it manifests: 

I decide to water my garden. 
As I turn on the hose in the driveway, 
I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. 

As I start toward the garage, 
I notice mail on the porch table that 
I brought up from the mail box earlier. 

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. 

I lay my car keys on the table, 
Put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, 
And notice that the can is full. 

So, I decide to put the bills back 
On the table and take out the garbage first... 

But then I think, 
Since I'm going to be near the mailbox 
When I take out the garbage anyway, 
I may as well pay the bills first. 

I take my check book off the table, 
And see that there is only one check left. 
My extra checks are in my desk in the study, 
So I go inside the house to my desk where 
I find the can of Diet Coke I'd been drinking. 

I'm going to look for my checks, 
But first I need to push the Diet Coke aside 
So that I don't accidentally knock it over. 

The Diet Coke is getting warm, 
And I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. 

As I head toward the kitchen with the
Diet Coke, 
A vase of flowers on the counter 
Catches my eye--they need water. 

I put the Diet Coke on the counter and 
Discover my reading glasses that 
I've been searching for all morning. 
I decide I better put them back on my desk, 
But first I'm going to water the flowers. 

I set the glasses back down on the counter , 
Fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. 
Someone left it on the kitchen table. 

I realize that tonight when we go to 
watch TV,
I'll be looking for the remote, 
But I won't remember that it's on the 
kitchen table, 
So I decide to put it back in the den where
it belongs, 
But first I'll water the flowers. 

I pour some water in the flowers, 
But quite a bit of it spills on the floor. 

So, I set the remote back on the table, 
Get some towels and wipe up the spill. 

Then, I head down the hall trying to 
Remember what I was planning to do. 

At the end of the day: 
The car isn't washed, 
The bills aren't paid, 
There is a warm can of 
Diet Coke sitting on the counter, 
The flowers don't have enough water, 
There is still only 1 check in my check book, 
I can't find the remote, 
I can't find my glasses, 
And I don't remember what I did 
with the car keys. 
Then, when I try to figure out why 
nothing got done today, 
I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day, 
And I'm really tired. 

I realize this is a serious problem, 
And I'll try to get some help for it, but
first I'll check my e-mail.... 

I don't remember who I've sent it to. 

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, 
your day is coming!

P.S. I don't remember who sent it to me, so if it was you, I'm sorry.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow , thank God there is a name for this , I thought I was the only one.

Anonymous said...

OMG, this is the absolute truth. Daily routine around here.

Anonymous said...

I feel better now. Maybe we can all start a support group. We can alternate golf courses for our meetings...maybe get insurance to pay for it!

Jim said...

You're killing me.

Have you been following me around or something? :-)

Anonymous said...

I can certainly relate to this!

Anonymous said...

This article is the perfect description of the democratic liberal left; just watch Pelosi, Waters, Cummings, Clinton, etc.

Anonymous said...

Ha Ha Ha Ha ...THEN ITS... "MILLER TIME" !!!!!!!!!!!!!!