The Lonely Widow

A lonely widow, aged 70, decided that is was time to get married again. So she put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

A. HUSBAND WANTED b. MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's) c. MUST NOT BEAT ME d. MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME, AND e. MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED! ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON..

Two days later the doorbell rang. The old lady opened the door, and much to her dismay, there sat a gray-haired gentleman in a wheel chair. He had no arms or legs.

"Are you responding to my ad?" the woman asked. "You're not really asking me to consider you, are you?"

"Yes, I am," the man replied.

The old lady sneered, "Just look at you. You have no legs!"

The old gentleman smiled and said, "Therefore, I cannot run around on you!"

"You don't have any arms, either!" she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled, and softly replied, "Therefore, I can never beat you!"

She pause, raised an eyebrow and asked intently, "Are you still good in bed?"

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"

The wedding is set for Saturday.