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Sunday, December 13, 2015

The perfect day. January 20, 2017

1. President Donald Trump and Vice-President Ted Cruz are sworn into office.

2. In a rare event on inauguration day, Congress convenes for an emergency meeting to repeal the illegal and unconstitutional Socialist healthcare farce known as Obamacare. The new Director of Health and Social Services, Dr. Ben Carson, announces that an independent group of healthcare management professionals is hired to handle healthcare services for poor and low income people. They are also assigned the duty of eliminating Medicare and Medicaid fraud. Government’s costs for public healthcare are reduced by 90%. Healthcare insurance premiums for working Americans are reduced by 50%. The move saves billions of taxpayer paid dollars. Healthcare service in the U.S. improves 100%.

3. Newly appointed department of Homeland Security, General McChrystal, announces the immediate deployment of Troops to the U.S. Mexico border to control illegal immigration and the immediate deportation of illegals with criminal records or links to terrorist groups. New bio-encrypted Social Security ID’s are required by every American citizen. Birthright is abolished. All immigration from countries that represent a threat to the safety of American citizens is terminated indefinitely. The move saves American taxpayers billions of dollars. Several prisons are closed.

4. Newly appointed Secretary of Business and Economic Development, Mitt Romney, eliminates more than half of the Government agencies operating under the Obama administration saving taxpayers billions of dollars. Stocks rise 100%.

5. Newly appointed Director of Government Finance, Rand Paul, announces the abolition of the IRS and displays a copy of the new Federal Tax Return form. It consists of one page. The instructions consist of two pages. The Federal Reserve is audited. The move saves American taxpayers billions of dollars and increases tax revenue.

6. Hillary Clinton is in jail. Her cell is directly across from Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton who are serving time for ‘Hate Crimes." She bitches at them constantly from behind the bars of her cell in what some might call cruel and unusual punishment.

7. Bernie Sanders is in a mental asylum. His room is directly across from Nancy Pelosi, Debbie Wasserman Schultz, Chris Matthews and Al Franken. They meet for tea every day at ten and discuss the success and benefits of Communism and Socialism throughout the world. They wonder when the “Mothership” is going to pick them up and return them to their home planets.

8. Windows 12 is released. It is designed for humans, doesn’t try to satisfy the needs of every person on the planet, doesn’t require a degree in nuclear physics to operate and looks just like Windows 7 except it is easier to use.

9. Barack Obama flees the United States under cover of darkness and returns to his homeland of Kenya before his trial for treason begins. He deplanes on a remote jungle airstrip. He was last seen wandering through the jungle singing “Hakuna Matata” with a chimp named Commie.

10. Oscar Meyer announces the introduction of a new cholesterol and fat free pepperoni that tastes just like regular pepperoni. Not to be outdone, Kraft Foods announces the introduction of several varieties of cholesterol and fat free cheeses that taste just like regular cheese.

11. A committee is not established to determine what is causing global cooling. Billions of taxpayer dollars are saved.

12. Dead people are no longer allowed to vote; a huge blow for the Democrat Party.

And this, my friends,constitutes THE PERFECT DAY!

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

As the old movie title goes "It's a wonderful life."

Anonymous said...

Amen to that!

Anonymous said...

That absolutely would be the perfect day.

Pete da Pirate said...

Masses of Christians attend churches every Sunday and worship God and our Lord Jesus Christ. All churches now provide care for the poor and disabled. Mentally ill people are placed in sanctuaries of care. Open carry by all.

Anonymous said...

O Happy Day!

Anonymous said...

Oh to dream, to dare to dream...

Anonymous said...

If you believe it will be so!!!

Anonymous said...

...and Hee Haw comes back on TV!!!

Anonymous said...

Yeah, keep dreaming Republicant's. Meanwhile, your leadership wants to give away a quarter of a million jobs to foreigners. R or D is all the same once they get elected. But, Trump will be different... Riiiiiggggghhhhhttttttt.

Anonymous said...

All we need is 6, 7, and 9......

Anonymous said...

Agree with all except # 4, can't see Mr.Obama-lite/Romney-care eliminating any government agency.

Anonymous said...

Add that all useless lazy good for nothing welfare queens and their offspring must work for food!

Anonymous said...

Love this...

Anonymous said...

Bruce Jenner should be in NO> 6 also.

Anonymous said...

What a wonderful thing to read. All we can do is hope it will come true.

Anonymous said...

As Kate Smith used to sing, GOD BLESS AMERICA, LAND THAT I LOVE. Now, that's a great day in AMERICA!

Anonymous said...

I'm glad it's just a dream.