Living alone can get a bad rep. Science doesn't help: A study out of the University of California at Berkeley found that living alone increases mortality in older people due to lack of social contact. Finnish researchers confirmed that flying solo can up the likelihood of an alcohol-related death. OK fine, I get it: If you live alone and never go out, or talk to people, or develop relationships, that can have some serious negative consequences. But brush aside the image of you, sitting in front of a pizza for one, trying to talk to it like that volleyball in Castaway, fading away slowly, and snap into the reality. Which is, of course, that living alone is awesome, and every woman should do it—at least for a little while.
Everything in here is mine. That's what I thought to myself when I moved into my own place over five years ago. I had just moved out of an apartment where I had been living with a boyfriend—more accurately, an ex boyfriend, hence the move—and I was filled with relief. Being in my own apartment gave me a physical space where I could reimagine my whole life, on only my terms. I framed black-and-white photos of the people I loved most and put them on my bookshelf, because that made me happy. I filled the fridge with healthy-ish food and didn't have to make room for someone's six-pack or weird-smelling takeout. I stayed up late working on a passion project, not having to worry if my Joni Mitchell Pandora station was playing too loud, and spread out in my bed after—right smack in the middle—exhausted and fulfilled.
I was the queen of my own 400-square-foot-castle for three years, and looking back, I can see that that short stretch of time was crucially important to establishing my independence. It started with small things: I negotiated my rent on my own, created a household budget (for one!) on my own, hashed out a savings plan on my own. I signed up for half-marathons, and actually ran them. I tried hot yoga, and hated it, but whatever, I tried it. And then, the results had a bigger payoff: I put in late hours at work, because I didn't have anyone asking me "Will you be home for dinner?" and got promoted. I met a guy on one of many fun, little dates, and he turned out to be the love of my life. I also got gutsier: I traveled abroad alone, several times, without thinking twice about it.
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6 comments:
Those people are also real narrow minded for some reason.
This is an essay from a very lonely person trying to justify their condition of being alone.
OMG... you two don't have a clue. So many small town girls move from their fathers house to their boyfriends house and then on to another mans house.
When my father died I found out that my mother didn't have a clue about life..she didn't even know how to pump her own gas. It was a total disaster. She didn't know how to maintain a life at all. I had to come back home just to straighten the mess out.
Too many young women in this area are doing the same thing today. They move from man to man without ever learning how to do anything for themselves all the while thinking they are being so smart. Government will pay the rest if needed.
This is not an article about a Salisbury woman...it is an article that should apply to all women who don't know how to balance a check book, keep a budget, or manage a savings account. Sadly...there are plenty of them around.
Good point and right on 8.36 most of them screw up there credit by 21 to 25 having to have the newest cell phone fancy nails and a north face 200 buck jacket.so after that there stuck in the poor house unless they find a man or men to finance there so called hi end lifestyle.
there are plenty of young men that fit into this profile as well. They live 4 and 5 to a house and just barely make ends meet while drifting from one low paying job to another. Some people take longer to grow up than others..that is true. It just seems as though there isn't much emphasis placed on growing up any more. Even young people who graduate from college are stuck in a cycle of living day to day because of the debt load facing them. There seems to be an attitude that you are "screwed if you do and screwed if you don't" among young people today. I'm not so sure I would feel differently if I was just starting out.
Sounds like a smart girl to me. And if she's lonely or scared to live alone, get a big dog. They will protect you and be a lot of loving company with no back talk.
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