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Thursday, March 13, 2008

Woman removed from bathroom after TWO years on toilet!

Authorities in Ness County,Kansas were called to a home on Febuary 27 and removed a 35 year old woman from the bathroom toilet,where she had been for approximately TWO years,so long,in fact that her skin had to started to grow AROUND the toilet seat.According to her live-in boyfriend,she started staying in the bathroom more and more until finally she just refused to leave and stayed on the commode.He claims they had a "normal" relationship,and over the last two years he took food to her and bathed her but let her stay on the toilet.Kory McFarren stated that his girlfriend,Pam Babcock,had endured physical abuse as a child and developed a severe phobia about leaving the sanctuary of the bathroom.He even brought her clean clothes,changed her and claims he has been "taking care of her" for their entire 16 year relationship and that at no time was she ever forced to stay in the bathroom.Police are considering what charges,if any,to file against McFadden,but they say there is no evidence to prove she was held against her will or restrained in any way,nor confined to the room by force or threat.When she became ill last month,he called the police and they found her on the toilet,and her legs had atrophied to the point that doctors say she may never walk again.She has refused to cooperate with the police or medical staff treating her in a Wichita hospital and her boyfriend admits "I should have sought help sooner but its not my fault-she got it set in her mind that was a safe place for her and she is an adult who can make up her own mind so I kinda got used to it"WTF?I do not know who is more in need of a shrink,him or her!While authorites say they "do not know if she is physically or mentally ill",I think its pretty safe to say anyone who lives in a bathroom and sits on the hopper so long her ass grows around it has some mental health issues.While McFadden is certainly not guilty of any abuse,he is guilty of neglect.His going along with her eccentricities did not help her at all and he is her "enabler".Maybe he loved her and wanted her to be happy,but on the other hand if he loved her so much,why did he put up with this for so long?Neighbors report they havent seen her in SIX years.Why didnt THEY call someone in the last six years?I know if one of my neighbors just drops out of sight and I see her partner coming and going,it would not take me even six WEEKS to be nosy and ask about him/her-are they sick?Did they go away?I may be a pest or a busybody,but I would certainly make sure that person was OK and still breathing,and not dead or holed up in a bathroom for two whole years.I pity Ms.Babcock because she had to be pretty traumatized to think that she was not even safe in her home,but I have no pity for her boyfriend,only anger and resentment.If I spent one DAY sequestered in the bathroom,you can bet that Mr.Totmom would kick the door down and carry my fat ass out of there,kicking and screaming.He would physically make me seek psychiatric care,even if he had to commit me against my will-because he loves me.I would do the same for him.All McFadden did was enable his girlfriends mental illness just as a codependent enables alcoholic or drug-addicted partners.Had he sought help for her when this nonsense started,she could have been hospitalized and/or given outpatient mental health care,and with the right drugs,she could have had a normal life or something close to it.At this point, she may never walk again and odds are she will remain institutionalized for many years.Jail is too harsh for McFadden but he DEFINITELY needs psychiatric help for his own issues.A normal,sane man doesnt participate in this kind of thing.What do y'all think?

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

i totally agree with u joe. this man needs help as well. from a womans perspective, i beleive that if these two people were in a 16 yr relationship and she has only been on the toliet for the last 2 yrs...then something or someone had to have triggered her fear to never leave it. its only logical to me that he did something to her to cause this in the first place. maybe his guilt for that is what kept him from getting her medical attention. what was he hiding those 2 yrs? he cannot say he was protecting her because her ass growing around the seat tells me she was too terrified to ever move and she would rather die sitting there. again from a woman's perspective i think of what "parts" she is protecting on the toilet so he cannot get to them?? many questions come to mind but if i had to go on only whats reported thus far....i still say he is guilty. period. guilty for letting her condition get this way so long, and then some. it should be interesting to see when the shrinks give "thier" take on the whole matter. my honest opinion is noone will probably ever know "all" the real truth. noone that is but him and her.

Anonymous said...

Hope that house had two bathrooms

Anonymous said...

...sometimes my husband is in the bathroom so long I begin to wonder if he's attached to the toilet, too....

Anonymous said...

Is that whats happened to the Mare? She's been on the seat way to long too! And those of you letting her stay there are just as sick as this man is.

They both {he and she}have severe mental problems!

Kathryn said...

As a therapist, I wouldn't want to make a diganosis of this poor woman because I don't know her. But I do know that severe anxiety/panic disorders cause people to be too TERRIFIED to leave their homes and they often feel there is one place in the house that's safer than others so they stay there as much as possible.
And, if you don't know there's help available, the disorder gets more & more entrenched and later, much harder to treat effectively.
It's not fair to assume that the boyfriend had any part in causing this. Panic disorders can start for any number of reasons. But yes, he should have done something about it much sooner!

joe albero said...

Kathryn,

That being said, give us your breakdown on John Robinson? ;-)

Kathryn said...

Joe -
Not enough information! ;-))