Gentle Thoughts For Today

Birds of a feather flock together...

and then crap on your car.

A penny saved.....

is a government oversight.

The older you get, the tougher it is to

lose weight..... because by then your body

and your fat have gotten to be

really good friends.

The easiest way to find something lost

around the house.... is to buy

a replacement.

He who hesitates....

is probably right.
Did you ever notice:

the Roman Numerals for forty

(40) are"XL"

If you think there is good in everybody....

you haven't met everybody.

If you can smile when things go wrong.....

you have someone in mind to blame.

The sole purpose of a child's middle name.....

is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

There's always a lot to be thankful for if you

take time to look for it.  For example, I am

sitting here thinking how nice it is

that wrinkles don't hurt.

Did you ever notice:

When you put the 2 words "The" and

"IRS" together it spells "Theirs."

Aging:

Eventually you will reach a point

when you stop lying about your age and

start bragging about it.

The older we get, the fewer things seem

worth waiting in line for.

Some people try to turn back their odometers.

Not me, I want people to know

"why" I look this way.

[I've traveled a long way and

some of the roads weren't paved.]

When you are dissatisfied and would like

to go back to your youth,

think of Algebra.
You know you are getting old when everything

either dries up or leaks.
One of the many things no one tells you

about aging is that it is such a nice change from

being young.  Ah, being young is beautiful,

but being old is comfortable.
Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground

with sticks, it was called witchcraft.

Today, it's called golf.