He’s also a dad, and it’s from all those perspectives that he took on his fourth book, an alarm bell of sorts titled, “The Collapse of Parenting,” out recently from Basic Books.
Sax, who lives in Exton, Pennsylvania, argues that American families are facing a crisis of authority, where the kids are in charge, out of shape emotionally and physically, and suffering because of it. He calls for a reordering of family life in response.
A conversation with Dr. Leonard Sax:
The Associated Press: What exactly do you mean by a collapse of parenting?
Sax: I wrote about an office visit with a 10-year-old boy who is sitting and playing a game on his mobile phone, ignoring me and his mom as I’m talking with his mom about his stomachache. And his mom is describing his stomachache and the boy says, ‘Shut up, mom, you don’t know what you’re talking about.’ And he laughs.
That would have been very unusual in 1990 or 2000. It is now common: children, girls and boys, being disrespectful to parents, being disrespectful to one another, being disrespectful to themselves, verbally and otherwise. The mother did nothing, just looked a little embarrassed. The culture has changed in a profound way in a short period of time in ways that have really harmed kids.
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9 comments:
The last 8 years of obama hasn't helped this issue , I do believe obama is responsible for most of this. The parents , if they have parents , will be working 2 or 3 jobs , the other parents are on dope of some sort.
Most inner city kids don't know who their parents are.
Remember , it starts at the top .
Now you know why school teachers bail out at such high rates.
That would have been the last time my 10 year old would have told me to shut up. Of course I haven't had a 10 year old for 40 years.
Sorry 659, the pos has nothing to do with this. Parents do not want to parent, they want to be their child's friend. That and the fact that there are no consequences for any negative behavior at home, school, fields etc. I have never seen such a more entitled narcissistic group of kids in my life. I have children myself, it is a struggle everyday to raise well adjusted, responsible children. When things do not go the way planned, I only blame myself.
7:48 is exactly right parents don't parent they want friendships with their children and to look like the "cool" parents to other parents and their childrens' friends. I saw it in the 80's when a girl next door would come over to our house and hang out because she said she was so ashamed of how her mother acted around her friends and boyfriends. Her mother wanted to hang around them as one of the girls, she said she hated her mother she wanted someone to tell her what to do she said to have rules and someone who just treated her as a daughter. This treatment does make them narcissistic, causes real hatred, and no respect for any authority because it is often too late when they realize their childrens behavior is scary, then they can't wait for the children to leave home so they don't have to deal with it.
7:48 and 8:10 really summed it up very accurately.
And these moms think they're doing the kind, loving thing. But the reality is-- they're being very SELFISH. It's all about how they feel about themselves, not how they feel about their kids. If they really love their kids, they will do what's best for the kids, even if it means the kids getting upset with them sometimes.
This current snowflake generation is destined to fail. We are going to have quite a problem getting them straightened out.
It's a scary to think they will be the ones that are running this country is 10-20 years.
Joe-- I hope you will keep this post toward the top for a good while, so it's right in our face.
There's an awful lot of 'cool mommies' (and dads) that need to see how they're ruining their kids' lives and setting us up for serious social problems..
Good behavior and respect begins at home. And discipline is necessary when appropriate.
Also, parents need to refrain from buying electronic devices for small children. Let them play with basic toys and run around outside more. Let them earn rewards for good behavior and obedience. They will adapt much better in the real world when they leave home.
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