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Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Divorce Granted

A judge was interviewing a lady regarding her pending divorce, and asked, “What are the grounds for your divorce?”

She replied, “About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by.”

“No,” he said, “I mean what is the foundation of this case?”

“It is made of concrete, brick and mortar,” she responded.

“I mean,” he continued, “What are your relations like?”

“I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husband’s parents.”

He said, “Do you have a real grudge?”

“No,” she replied, “We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one.”

“Please,” he tried again, “is there any infidelity in your marriage?”

“Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don’t necessarily like the music, but the answer to your question is ‘yes’.”

“Ma’am, does your husband ever beat you up?”

“Yes,” she responded, “about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do.”

Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, “Lady, why do you want a divorce?”

“Oh, I don’t want a divorce,” she replied. “I’ve never wanted a divorce. My husband does. He said he can’t communicate with me.”

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

This woman was Nancy Pelosi!

Anonymous said...

Men are from Mars - Women are from Venus. Or some crap like that. All I know is when my wife is talking I hear Charlie Brown's mother - wa wawa wawa.

Anonymous said...

I need some marital advice if anyone out there in cyberspace knows the answer: How can a guy watch a football game & give it his total concentration while his wife is yakking? (That's talking continuously for you come here's)

Anonymous said...

You have to piss her off to the point that she is no longer talking to you. Get some sex first, it will be a while before you get any more.