Attention

The opinions expressed by columnists are their own and do not represent our advertisers

Thursday, March 08, 2012

ALGAE, YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL

Obama’s Algae-Powered Car: Chevy Fishtank

“Speaking at the University of Miami today, President Obama boldly challenged skyrocketing oil prices by suggesting that we should start using algae instead of gas.

“Three years ago I came out with a bold proposal to inflate American tires, and that alone has diminished our dependency on foreign oil by 83 percent. The remaining 17 percent can be easily made up for with algae – if we can only figure out how to make energy out of that.

“Why algae? Because we’ve got a lot of it. In fact, as a nation, we’re loaded with pretty much everything – take dirt, for example. We have a lot – A LOT of dirt. Except ‘dirt’ doesn’t have the same foreign, cosmopolitan ring to it as the word ‘algae’ has.”

“So I’m hereby announcing production of a new algae-powered automobile: the Chevy Fishtank.”

More

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

I dont know what its going to take to get it through your thick skulls

If you want this economy to turn around, we have to get off of oil dependency. We cant keep using oil when the world is beginning to run low in parts. We need renewable energy and cleaner energy to ensure future generations dont pay for our mis-haps.

Until you all realize that, we'll continue to have completely ignorant articles like this.

Anonymous said...

Did I read that right? Obama had a bold idea of inflating american tires and it diminished our dependency of foreign oil by 83%. Does this guy think we are stupid? 83% by adding air to our tires? Yea, and the fish jumped clean over the boat. This dipshit never checked a dipstick.

Anonymous said...

10:18 hey clown. I know so many of you are anti-intellectual and anti-science but the least you could do is get your facts straight before trying to bash something/someone.

Anonymous said...

This article started my day with a good laugh,thanks.

Anonymous said...

I beleive I am going to start an algae company and call it Green Algae America. My new "green" venture should qualify for a grant in the 2 to 3 hundred million range and then I can go ahead and fail. With the money I pocket I can start up a medical marijuana "clinic" and make some real money. You just gotta love this country.

Anonymous said...

All of you complain about green energy getting federal dollars and call it a pipe dream, yet you conveniently forget that the US likely wouldn't be one of the top oil producing nations if the oil industry wouldn't have received federal subsidies throughout the 1900's.

Anonymous said...

What an idiot.

Anonymous said...

It is a pipe dream, 7:45, in that it takes lots of grant money (read our tax dollars) to make "green" happen. Even to make solar panels on your hosue remotely affordable it takes tax credits, energy credits(another scam), and power company contributions. And then the photo voltaic panels only have a 20 life expectancy! My point is if going "green" was truly viable it would not take others peoples money to make it work.

Anonymous said...

This sounds like a Saturday Night Live skit.