Netanyahu Urges France to Pursue Peace and Practice Restraint

[ Note: Except for the first two paragraphs, this is 'satire.' ]

Dear Citizens of France:

My heartfelt sympathies to you and the French people for the horrible and barbaric terrorist murder spree that left over a hundred of your compatriots dead and hundreds more wounded. .

That murderous terrorist rampage on Friday night is all too familiar to us. We have a deep understanding of how to deal with terrorism, and are more than ready to help you as we do all over the world when tragedies occur.

First, however, we wish to share with you what we usually hear from the world in the aftermath of these “incidents” or "unrest" ( which is what the world calls terrorism when it happens in Israel ). Perhaps these pointers will help you cope and avoid future "incidents" - at least those who give us advice, including your heads of state, must think it will, or else why would they give it?

As your government told us recently, following an “incident” in Israel, countries must “protect themselves from militants, but show restraint so as to not further fuel a highly sensitive situation in the region.”

With one's friends there is no need to make peace. Peace is made between enemies, never mind if they don't want it. There is no military solution to the problem of terrorism, and this is why you must seek a diplomatic solution.

You must understand the pain and needs of the angry Muslims shooting and setting off explosives, and not respond inappropriately so that there is no escalation of the cycle of violence.

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