In Florida , an atheist created a case against the upcoming Easter and Passover Holy days. He hired an attorney to bring a discrimination case against Christians, Jews and observances of their holy days. The argument was that it was unfair that atheists had no such recognized Days. The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the passionate presentation by the lawyer, the judge banged his gavel declaring,"Case Dismissed!"
The lawyer immediately stood objecting to the ruling saying, "Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and others. The Jews have Passover,Yom Kippur and Hanukkah, yet my client and all other atheists have no such holidays."
The judge leaned forward in his chair saying, "But you do. Your client, counsel, is woefully ignorant."
The lawyer said, "Your Honor, we are unaware of any special observance or holiday for atheists."
The judge said, "The calendar says April 1st is April Fools Day. Psalm 14:1 states, 'The fool says in his heart, there is no God.' Thus, it is the opinion of this court, that if your client says there is no God, Then he is a fool. Therefore, April 1st is his day. Court is adjourned.
DelMarVa's Premier Source for News, Opinion, Analysis, and Human Interest Contact Publisher Joe Albero at alberobutzo@wmconnect.com or 410-430-5349
39 comments:
Is this a joke, or a true story? Or both?
It is a good one....
Piss off Joe Im an atheist.
anon said...
Piss off Joe Im an atheist.
10:45 AM
Atheist suck, you anti-albero blogger.
I bet if you were in a plane rapidly descending to the ground you would be praying to God!!
annon 10:45 - Now there's something to brag about!
Give us your name so we can help you celebrate your Holly Day April the 1st.
Didn't atheists actually post signs denouncing Christmas adjacent to Christmas displays in a Washington State building over the holidays? Jerks.
He really observed the seperation between church and state to come up with that decision didnt he, Judge is a morion. Relegion is a joke, a state of denial. Escape if you can.
Amen, brother Joe. Amen. Keep up the good work and keep spreading the Word.
As for the atheist...I wonder if you take the day off from work on "our" days. My guess is yes you do.
Here's one more for you to cry about:
One nation, under God...
Have a nice day, FOOL.
11:47. I'm not originally involved here. But..In the situation you present, I am praying for:
1) the co-pilot {and/or Joe Patroni}.
2) a pretty nearby stewardess.
3) the drink cart {one time I won't be paying cash}
4) All of the above.
That whole "god" thing will probably sort itself out upon impact.
What is the epitaph on the grave of an atheist?
All Dressed Up And Nowhere To Go
One should lead a life free of/from superstition.
We have a propensity to drink, but that doesn't mean that we should all go out and get drunk. We have a propensity for religion, but that doesn't mean we should all start believing in stupid stuff.
Also for all you atheists:
Today is January 4, 2009 AD
AD= After the Death of Jesus Christ
And 2010 years ago it would be the time period of BC which means BEFORE CHRIST.
So just get used to it. There was and is a God. And if you ever need another reminder just how important he is, flip over a penny, In God We Trust!!!!
My life has been a whole lot better since the Lord has been part of it.
Give Atheist 2 days. Hallowen and April Fool's day.
1:29
before you call someone a "morion" for GOD sakes learn how to spell it correctly
To all of you fairy tale believers, I truly would like to ask. I am not one who questions, confronts, or condems those who choose to flock. Is it OK with you if I don't believe? Or should I be stoned to death? Yea, damn right I take off on those holidays!
Also, AD means after date, not after death. Sheeesh... and I'm the non believer, go figure.
6:01
A.D. stands for Anno Domini.
6:01 pm, "Anno Domini", abbreviated AD or A.D., means "in the year of our Lord" Just fill in the little google box; press enter; wikipedia; and try to read. Oh, I forgot, you probably caint!
6:46. your playground tantrum over my refusing to buy into it all, and your whining over my reading skills would make a slight bit of sense if you would learn how to spell "cain't".
Is that all you've got, anon? The hillbilly pronunciation of the word "can't" is something else you don't understand. God bless you, you need it.
5:56 don't worry when you end up in hell you'll have a whole eternity to think there is a God and one day you will stay before Him. You are a fool as God's Word says. He provided the way out of Hell and as simple as believing Jesus. But it's your life, when you go to hell, don't say no one warned you!
LOL Reese-I would call on God first but Joe Patrone would run a very close second.He was THE MAN!He could tell you how to land a 747 with one engine left over the phone while eating lunch!
Hey 5:56, Haven't you heard? "God prefers athiests" <--google that
If you were going to have a large party, would you invite interesting people, or only people who are willing to kiss your a$$ ???
If god is going to fill up heaven with people to hang around with for eternity, why wouldn't he invite the most interesting people? Believers and followers are just boring...
And athiests, by and large, have far better morals. We don't get our morality from a silly list.
Hey 3:37
Haven't you heard, The AD/BC designations are obsolete, and have been replaced by CE/BCE for all international usage. In other words, they took god out of the equation. bye-bye god.
Also: "AD" refers to the years since the BIRTH of Christ, not the year of his death. Get it right!
Ahhh, the name-calling over religion. Nice.
There are many different ways to look at "God" or the "Creator." Or to ignore the subject completely. But the Golden Rule applies to us all; do unto others as you would have them do unto you. You don't have to believe (or not believe) as your neighbor does, but you can have respect for their opinions and beliefs. All paths lead to the Creator. Christians, when you start bashing people who don't believe as you do, when you call them names, how Christian are you? Are you doing unto others as you would have them do unto you?
As a side note, BC and AD are being replaced gradually with BCE and CE, Before Common Era and Common Era. BC and AD are meaningless to the people who do not follow Christ, and there are plenty of them. BC and AD are meaningless to Jews, Muslims and the Chinese.
They say there are no atheists in foxholes (or rapidly falling planes). When in dire straits or when facing imminent death, we find that we do believe in SOMETHING; we all call on a higher power at some time, even so-called atheists. But I do wish that when discussions regarding religion come up, that people would be more respectful. Especially you, atheist 10:45 AM. Karma's a bitch!
Priceless!!!
True there are no atheists in foxholes, but there were no stewardesses at Bastogne!!
2:38 am-
Yes they have been replaced by "scholars" about 35 years ago who dont believe in God. Most professors are Liberal and dont believe in god.
BCE means before common era which started to be used about 30-40 years ago by one of your wacko friends in denial. It has been BC for THOUSANDS of years. But since some group of wackos changed it 30 some years ago it should now be widely accepted right?? GET A LIFE, i hope you turn your ways because one day, EVERY KNEE SHALL BOW.
So, Reece Bobby, are you an a believer in God, an atheist, or just an insufferable phoney who pretends to be "holier than thou" with your smart*ss comments ?
So 2:55; I'll tell you mine, if you tell me yours- Are you still officially on-the-payroll; or merely just "laid off" by the DT....
C'Mon back at me, meat...give me a chance to break your "symbolic" DT nose, you little girl!! C'mon!!!!
2:20 AM really, well do you believe it is wrong to lie, do you believe it's wrong to steal, do you believe it's wrong to lust? Well it comes from the Bible. If a baby is born and is taught that lying is wrong and disobeying is wrong it all comes from the Bible. This came to light way before there every was an athiest. You didn't invent a moral list, God did. Well after you are DEAD, the Bible will still be around as well as the name of Jesus. John Lennon thought the Beatles were bigger than Jesus. Well he is dead and 100 hundred years from now 2109 I guarantee you that Jesus name will still be around and John Lennon's name will not. Jesus said I am the Alpha, Omega Beginning & the End. Who cares about the type of people that You think God wants around in Heaven. I am going there because He saved me and to live in a world without sin, drugs, cancer, pain, agony, I will Trust the in the One who created me and will Save me to the end. As it states in the Bible, which Joe has stated, The Fool says in his heart there is no God. You are a fool to not trust in Him. You will have eternity to think about it where it will never end and one day you will call Jesus Lord of Lords and King of Kings & you will say Worthy is the Lamb!
4:37, No. Sorry. Morality does not come from the bible. Morality comes from an ethical system of beliefs. Whether that belief system comes from humanitarian principles, or from your silly list from god, DOES make a difference.
How many philosophy courses have you taken? (or how many good philosophy books have you read?). It's far more complex than the simple analysis we offer here, but consider this: There have been a few Christian philosophers, but it's mostly a joke when dogma rears its ugly head where clear thinking is needed. This is especially true when trying to discuss morality.
When it comes to morality, religion is the problem, not the solution.
FoxeyinFruitland
I agree with you. I can't stand him either.
You know Joe, you get alot of people weighing in when you post the religious stuff. I was the third post here and was joking. Although Im an atheist I dont think theres any reason either side should be bashing the other.
This is just silly. And shame on the christians here. How "chistian" are they being?
I am not an "anti- joe blogger" I am a conservative and like seeing some conservative news mixed with my liberal media.
It makes me sad to read these comments.
Hail FSM
The judge was being ignorant of another's belief, and insulting as he called him a fool. I thought we lived in a country that had freedom of religious beliefs? If he did that to a Muslim or a Jew, he would be seeing a lawsuit! Why can't athiests celebrate their beliefs/or lack of beliefs?
Everyone should be equal...isn't that what our country boasts of?
You guys are paying attention to the date that this was posted, right?
Some great Psalsms that no one seems to quote much to others:
2:8-9 Ask of me, and I shall give thee the heathen for thine inheritance, and the uttermost parts of the earth for thy possession Thou shalt break them with a rod of iron; thou shalt dash them in pieces like a potter's vessel.
9:2-3 I will be glad and rejoice in thee: I will sing praise to thy name, O thou most High. When mine enemies are turned back, they shall fall and perish at thy presence.
31:6 I have hated them that regard lying vanities: but I trust in the LORD. (Hating people is okay as long as you love god, I guess.)
59:10 The God of my mercy shall prevent me: God shall let me see my desire upon mine enemies. (God accepts prayers to torture others.)
What a great religion of peace. Oh, I forgot one more:
137:9 Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones. (referring to slaughtering the babies of Babylon.)
There are certainly many verses in the Bible, particularly in the Old Testament, that believers struggle with. We need to remember that not all of it is endorsed by The Lord God, it is the thoughts of the writer. God allows us to express our feelings - even against Him! A good verse to put at the top of this blog would be: "Love your enemies, do good to them that hate you and misuse and abuse you" or "Speak the truth in love". There a far more Christ followers who live this way, than those who waste their time writing unkind things about those who do not believe in God.
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