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Saturday, February 23, 2019

WFB Obtains Employee Manual For Klobuchar Presidential Campaign

BuzzFeed, Huffington Post, and Yahoo News are among the outlets that have reported in the past week that Democratic Minnesota Senator Amy Klobuchar is something of a nightmare boss. These stories depict Klobuchar as "intolerably cruel," who subjects her staff to "bouts of explosive rage and regular humiliation." On one occasion, a staffer was """"accidentally"""" hit in the face with a binder thrown by Klobuchar.

Now anonymous sources have provided the Washington Free Beacon with what they claim is the employee manual for the 2020 Klobuchar presidential campaign. We cannot confirm its authenticity, but it rings true. Here it is, in full:
MORNING ROUTINE:
  • When Amy comes into the office, she will request a black coffee. Amy believes that coffee naturally tastes sugary, so you should add half a packet of sugar anyway. She will tell if it's Splenda.
  • There is a poncho and goggles on the coatrack outside Amy's office. Wear them when delivering the coffee.
  • Amy will require you to taste the coffee before she drinks it. Your lips are not to touch the lid. This tends to mean scalding, so it's recommended you suck on ice each morning to numb your throat and tongue.
  • Amy will occasionally claim that she has kidnapped your family and will harm them if she does not get her coffee within a time limit. This is almost never true.
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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Article is somewhat funny. However I've seen and heard bosses treat staff with distain. Yet outside the office delivers chocolates and genuine politeness. Go figure. Must be a very insecure 😈 individual or uses people to get ahead. Either way it is ugly.