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Wednesday, April 03, 2013

THE $2.00 BILL I TRIED TO SPEND

IF YOU'RE AS OLD AS I AM, THIS IS A RIOT!

Everyone should start carrying $2 bills! I'm STILL laughing!!

I think we need to quit saving our $2 bills and bring them out in public. The younger generation doesn't even know they exist!

STORY: On my way home from work, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat. I have a $50 bill and a $2 bill. I figure with the $2 bill, I can get something to eat and not have to worry about irritating anyone for trying to break a $50 bill.

Me: 'Hi, I'd like one seven-layer burrito please, to go.'

Server: 'That'll be $1.04. Eat in?'

Me: 'No, it's to go.' At this point, I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it kind of funny.

Server: 'Uh, hang on a sec, I'll be right back.'

He goes to talk to his manager, who is still within my earshot. The following conversation occurs between the two of them:

Server: 'Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?'
Manager: 'No. A what?'
Server: 'A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me...'
Manager: 'Ask for something else. There's no such thing as a $2 bill.'
Server: 'Yeah, thought so.'

He comes back to me and says, 'We don't take these. Do you have anything else?'

Me: 'Just this fifty. You don't take $2 bills? Why?
Server: 'I don't know.'
Me: 'See here where it says legal tender?'
Server: 'Yeah.'
Me: 'So, why won't you take it?'
Server: 'Well, hang on a sec.'

He goes back to his manager, who has been watching me like I'm a shoplifter, and says to him, 'He says I have to take it.'

Manager: 'Doesn't he have anything else?'
Server: 'Yeah, a fifty. I'll get it and you can open the safe and get change.
Manager: 'I'm not opening the safe with him in here.'
Server: 'What should I do?'
Manager: 'Tell him to come back later when he has real money.'
Server: 'I can't tell him that! You tell him.'
Manager: 'Just tell him.'
Server: 'No way! This is weird. I'm going in back.

The manager approaches me and says,
'I'm sorry, but we don't take big bills this time of night.'

Me: 'It's only seven o'clock! Well then, here's a two dollar bill.'
Manager: 'We don't take those, either.'
Me: 'Why not?'
Manager: 'I think you know why.'
Me: 'No really, tell me why.'

Manager: 'Please leave before I call mall security.'
Me: 'Excuse me?'
Manager: 'Please leave before I call mall security.'
Me: 'What on earth for?'
Manager: 'Please, sir..'

Me: 'Uh, go ahead, call them.'
Manager: 'Would you please just leave?'
Me: 'No.'
Manager: 'Fine -- have it your way then.'
Me: 'Hey, that's Burger King, isn't it?'

At this point, he backs away from me and calls mall security on the phone around the corner. I have two people staring at me from the dining area and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect.

A few minutes later this 45-year-oldish guy comes in.

Guard: 'Yeah, Mike, what's up?'
Manager (whispering): 'This guy is trying to give me some (pause) funny money.'
Guard: 'No kidding! What?'
Manager: 'Get this. A two dollar bill.'
Guard (incredulous): 'Why would a guy fake a two dollar bill?'
Manager: 'I don't know. He's kinda weird. He says the only other thing he has is a fifty.'
Guard: 'Oh, so the fifty's fake!'
Manager: 'No, the two dollar bill is.'
Guard: 'Why would he fake a two dollar bill?'
Manager : 'I don't know! Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?'
Guard: 'Yeah.'

Security Guard walks over to me and......
Guard: 'Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you're trying to use.'
Me: 'Uh, no.'
Guard: 'Lemme see 'em.'
Me: 'Why?'
Guard: 'Do you want me to get the cops in here?'

At this point I'm ready to say, 'Sure, please!' but I want to eat, so I say, 'I'm just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this two dollar bill.

I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I'm taking a swing at him. He takes the bill, turns it over a few times in his hands, and he says, 'Hey, Mike, what's wrong with this bill?'
Manager: 'It's fake.'
Guard: 'It doesn't look fake to me.'
Manager: 'But it's a two dollar bill.'
Guard: 'Yeah? '
Manager: 'Well, there's no such thing, is there?'

The security guard and I both look at him like he's an idiot and it dawns on the guy that he has no clue and is an idiot.

So, it turns out that my burrito was free, and he threw in a small drink and some of those cinnamon thingies, too.

Made me want to get a whole stack of two dollar bills just to see what happens when I try to buy stuff.

Just think... those two are of the age to be voting!!!

NOW do you understand why and how Obama got a 2nd term?

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Here in Salisbury, we should start using three dollar bills.....

Anonymous said...

Been saying it all along, but they call people like us idiots or conspiracy theorist... Yet if it is true, and you can see it, is it a conspiracy? NO...

Anonymous said...

They would probably take a three dollar bill since they know who Bill Clinton is.

Anonymous said...

lol..thanks for a good laugh 7:50

Anonymous said...

The article was good until you added a political slant at the end. Just as an FYI, the level of education of liberal voters tends to be higher than that of conservatives, with an overwhelming majority of Higher Education leaning towards liberalism.

Anonymous said...

Try a Susan Anthony dollar coin on them. That would totally send them over the edge

Anonymous said...

This is the same mentality of the majority of voters on Tuesday.
Unbelievable!

Anonymous said...

9:03--Higher Education leaning towards liberalism is because education has been dumbed down so the less fortunate can 'make the grade'. If parents, and educators, worked together to make sure the children were learning there would be no reason to dumb things down. That is why there is now a push to get our children learnings earlier. You don't see other cultures allowing their children to be lazy like American does, which makes more of what the dumbocrats want, entitlement slaves.
Sad times in these Unites States.

Anonymous said...

The fact that someone took the time to do this shows they are more ignorant than the people who don't know what a $2 bill is. It isn't relevant or pertinent information on the daily, so why should a manager or server know when they trying to run a business, not jump through hoops for this schmuck.

Anonymous said...

9:20, your an idiot. It's the principal behind this story that matters. The younger generation knows absolutely nothing anymore. I would have jumped through the same hoops plus some to prove my point as well.

Anonymous said...

9:30, you should do a little research before you call someone an idiot. If you had, you would realize that this story has been around since at least 1993, and therefore can't be applied as an example of the younger generation not knowing anything anymore.

Anonymous said...

I purchased a full uncut sheet of these years ago from a gift shop in D.C. Had it framed and tell people "In case of emergency, break glass".

Anonymous said...

When I was in Kansas City I took a $2 bill into a restaurant and ordered a scrapple sandwich.The young lady who took my order had never heard of scrapple and had never seen a $2 bill.I just wanted to get rid of it since I don't collect $2 bills.She did everything but call 911 on me.

Anonymous said...

9:20 So I guess they wouldn't take Hawaiian or Alaskan money either? Most of these people can not make the right change without the register telling them what to give back.

Anonymous said...

9:03 if liberals are so much smarter why do so many live in section 8 housing, food stamps, and the list is endless.

Anonymous said...

Liberal or conservative is not an issue here. If you can't add or subtract simple numbers totaling $1 you are a looser. You would never work for me. 9:20 I would return to that establishment and order something totaling $3.50 and hand the clerk $5.50, hoping to get my $2.00 bill back.

mdsenior said...

I gave a cashier $5.47 for a $3.47 order so I would get 2 ones back. She tried to tell me I gave her too much money and I had to explain what I was doing. She was old enough to be in college.

Anonymous said...

9:20 I really feel sorry for you. When you get into the real world out here, and what's going on with the younger people who can't add, subtract, or divide, America has a problem! But they do know how to multiply . There lies the problem! You should be ashamed of yourself for being so stupid.

Anonymous said...

What does Obama have to do with anything.

Anonymous said...

first question is why anyone would want to eat at Taco Bell