A Father's Ten Commandments

Happy Fathers’ Day. Get back to work.

Even on this day, you are on the clock. Your children are watching and listening.

Thus, I offer you a Father’s Ten Commandments.

Read it with humility. That is how it was written.

God help us all.

1. Your Soul Comes First

Sounds a little selfish to put yourself before anyone else, but we’re talking your soul, your lifeblood. Dads will get all kinds of advice about spending time with their kids and being present (some of which is spelled out below), but is your presence empty of meaning? Your own soul must be nourished, if you are to nourish others. (Remember the airline instructions in case of emergencies: apply your own oxygen mask before taking care of your children.)

2. Love Your Wife

We are imperfect but love never fails (1 Corinthians 13: 8-9). It is an absolute lesson to teach your children. However, the lesson is weakened considerably if Dad does not love Mom. This is a community you’re building, based on a committed love. The lesson extends beyond creating a secure home life. Love includes respect, and if you do not respect your wife, how do you expect your sons to respect women? How do you expect your daughters to avoid men who do not respect them?

3. Your Family Comes First

Yes, the first commandment still applies. We’re talking about how you apply that soulful life of yours. Having children is not something to check off the bucket list; they are not part of your life, they areyour life. Your work is not about your fulfillment (a bonus, if it is fulfilling) but about providing for your family. Your time is now a commodity to give away — make time for the whole family, and for each of them. Schedule that time like you would for any valued appointment. Remember the stories passed on by Hospice nurses: They never heard a patient regret not winning more accolades or making more money; the wish was for more time in relationships.

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