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Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Western Maryland to be Placed on the Auction Block

In a dramatic announcement late on Monday, Maryland State Comptroller, Peter Franchot, revealed that state officials were in high-level talks with representatives of both Pennsylvania and West Virginia to ascertain the possibility of the interest of either states purchasing Garrett , Allegany, and Washington counties, which comprise Maryland’s western panhandle.

Like many other states, Maryland is facing a fiscal crisis that threatens the funding for many critical projects, such as infrastructure and education. During the press conference at the Rocky Gap Casino near Flintstone, Maryland, Franchot admitted that this was a drastic solution, but one that was necessary to maintain the solvency of citizen services.


“There are only two ways to patch a hole in any budget,” said Franchot to the stunned crowd of senior citizens plugging their social security benefits into slot machines. “One is to cut expenses and the second is to increase revenues. The sale of Western Maryland would do both, simultaneously. In fact, the cost savings from not having to snowplow, alone, makes this deal a no-brainer.” 

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Editor's Note: Yes this is satire. Hope it made you smile

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Any chance we can get Del. and Va to bid on The Shore counties?

Anonymous said...

What a bunch of BS. Anyone that believes this needs their head checked. Good gosh

Ben Now Out of Salisbury said...

Hysterical

Obama Crooked Bastardo said...

Let's make a deal and Merge Eastern Shore Maryland into State of Delaware. DE State would get bigger and get more revenue, all citizens would shop TAX FREE - WIN WIN FOR EVERYBODY. And kick all of those Liberal Socialist Politicians to the West Side of the Bay Bridge. GIT-R-DONE!

Anonymous said...

The people who live in those counties probably really wish PA would purchase their county(ies) just like we wish, on the shore, that we could get out of MD.

Anonymous said...

Yes let DE buy us.

Anonymous said...

Delaware is a sh*t hole