Two Old Friends

Bob and Fred, two friends, met in the park every day to feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems.

One day Bob didn't show up. Fred didn't think much about it and figured maybe he had a cold or something..
But after Bob hadn't shown up for a week or so, Fred really got worried. 

A month had passed, and Fred figured he had seen the last of Bob, but one day, Fred approached the park and--lo and behold!--there sat Bob!

'For crying out loud Bob, what in the world happened to you?'

Bob replied, 'I have been in jail.'

'Jail!' cried Fred. What in the world for?'

'Well,' Bob said, 'you know Sue, that cute little blonde waitress at the coffee shop where I sometimes go?'

'Yeah,' said Fred, 'I remember her. What about her?

'Well,  the little gold-digging witch figured I was rich and she filed rape charges against me; and,

at 80 years old, I was so proud that when I got into court, I pleaded 'guilty'.

'The judge gave me 30 days for perjury.'