Southerner's Medical Dictionary

Artery............................. The study of paintings
Bacteria......................... Back door to cafeteria
Barium........................... What doctors do when patients die
Benign............................ What you be, after you be eight
Caesarean Section...... A neighborhood in Rome
Cat scan........................ Searching for Kitty
Cauterize...................... Made eye contact with her
Colic...............................A sheep dog
Coma............................ A punctuation mark
Dilate............................ To live long
Enema............................Not a friend
Fester............................ Quicker than someone else
Fibula............................ A small lie
Impotent.......................Distinguished, well known
Labour Pain................. Getting hurt at work
Medical Staff............... A Doctor's cane
Morbid........................... A higher offer
Nitrates......................... Cheaper than day rates
Node................................ I knew it
Outpatient..................... A person who has fainted
Pelvis................. .......... Second cousin to Elvis
Post Operative............ A letter carrier
Recovery Room.......... Place to do upholstery
Rectum......................... Damn near killed him
Secretion....................... Hiding something
Seizure........................ Roman emperor
Tablet........................... A small table
Terminal Illness.......... Getting sick at the airport
Tumor.......................... One plus one more
Urine............................. Opposite of you're out