37 Best Oxymorons:

37. Jumbo Shrimp
36. Adult Male
35. State Worker
34. Legally Drunk
33. Exact Estimate
32. Act Naturally
31. Found Missing
30. Resident Alien
29. Genuine Imitation
28. Airline Food
27. Good Grief
26. Government Organization
25. Sanitary Landfill
24. Alone Together
23. Small Crowd
22. Business Ethics
21. Soft Rock
20. Butt Head
19. Military Intelligence
18. Sweet Sorrow
17. Happily Married
16. Now And Then
15. Passive Aggression
14. Clearly Misunderstood
13. Peace Force
12. Extinct Life
10. Terribly Pleased
09. Computer Security
08. Political Science
07. Tight Slacks
06. Definite Maybe
05. Pretty Ugly
04. Rap Music
03. Working Vacation
02. Religious Tolerance
01. Microsoft Works

1. Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?
2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?
3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?
4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?
5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?
6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?
7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?
8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?
9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?
10. Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?
11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?
12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?
13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?
14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?
15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?
16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?
17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?
18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, ca n you read all right?
20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?
21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?
22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?
23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?
24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?