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Sunday, December 07, 2008

Children Learn What They Are Taught

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and a four-year old grandson. The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together nightly at the dinner table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating rather difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass often milk spilled on the tablecloth. The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. "We must do something about grandfather," said the son. I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor. So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There, grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner at the dinner table. Since grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl. Sometimes when the family glanced in grandfather's direction, he had a tear in his eye as he ate alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food. The four-year-old watched it all in silence.

One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, "What are you making?" Just as sweetly, the boy responded, "Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and mama to eat your food from when I grow up." The four-year-old smiled and went back to work. The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken, both knew what must be done. That evening the husband took grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table.

For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled. Children are remarkably perceptive. Their eyes ever observe, their ears ever listen, and their minds ever process the messages they absorb. If they see us patiently provide a happy home atmosphere for family members, they will imitate that attitude for the rest of their lives. The wise parent realizes that every day that building blocks are being laid for the child's future.

Let us all be wise builders and role models. Take care of yourself, ... and those you love, ... today, and everyday!

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yup. That is why, when my elderly father-in-law, who lives with us, gets particulary annoying, I refuse to allow my husband to send him away to live somewhere else. The right thing to do is the right thing to do, and here he will stay until he becomes too ill and/or frail not to have someone around all day long. Then we will expect my stay-at-home sister-in-law to do her part.

Anonymous said...

So, grannydragon, you are willing to take care of the old man and his money (social security, retirement,and savings) until he becomes a burden, then send him to sister-in-law. Lady, you're some kind of bitch.

Anonymous said...

12:55, you don't get it. And you never will. I don't feel sorry for you, but if you ever do come around in your old age, I might. Of all these gifts, Love is the greatest.
Barry G

Anonymous said...

Barry G said...
Of all these gifts, Love is the greatest.


I think grannydragon is just happy with the money.

Anonymous said...

How dare you people to assume that I receive money from my father-in-law! I don't. How dare you judge me when you have no knowledge of the situation!

We get NO MONEY from my father-in-law, and we ask him for none. We provide him with a home, electricity, satellite tv, telephone, heat and internet and ask for NOTHING in return. He will not allow us to buy his food; he buys his own because he has himself on a strict diet and prefers it that way.

Furthermore, the reason I have stated that when he becomes too ill or frail not to have someone with him all day, that he will go to his daughter's home is that my husband and I both work long, demanding hours at our jobs. When he gets to the point that he needs to have someone around all the time, neither one of us can afford to quit our jobs in order to provide around the clock care for him, nor do we have the money to pay for such care. As it is now, we are home only early in the morning and after 7PM. His daughter does not work and will be able to stay home with him when the time comes. And that appears to be a long time off.

Anon 12:55, how easy it is for you to hide behind an anonymous comment and call me a bitch. You know nothing about me, and you're a coward if you don't have the cojones to call me names to my face. Names, I might add, that I don't deserve.

You all ought to be ashamed of yourselves. You have jumped to conclusions for which you have no basis.

My father-in-law lives here because I invited him to and because I love him. And I am not mentioned in his will, nor do I expect or want to be, so you'll lose that argument, too.

You self-righteous b@stards owe me an apology, but I won't hold my breath waiting for one from such judgemental, mean-spirited people. How miserable are your lives that you immediately assume the worst about people you don't even know? Hoe devoid of comapassion are you that you see an ulterior motive for an act of love and kindness? I feel sorry for you.

Anonymous said...

I took care of my mother in her last months not because of anything other than having the privilege to do so. It was my turn to tend to her and it was an honor to do so. It wasn't easy those last months, how easy was it for her through all of the years raising us?

Not everyone has an ulterior motive. Most people actually have love in their hearts.

Granny D, you will be blessed in the end.

Anonymous said...

Granny D i think anon 12:55 was just trying to make you upset and you fell for it.

Anonymous said...

Anon 10:28: You're darned right I fell for it; having read and responded to this blog for some time now, I've seen the pattern of mean-spiritedness, anger and rudeness here. I am not afraid to stand up for myself.

Now let's clear something else up: my father-in law makes $40,000 a year in pensions and Social Security, so there goes anyone's argument that if he had any money, I'd take him for it. In fact, it is my sister-in-law who runs up his Discover Card bill every month to the tune of $1200 to $1400, and he pays it, no questions asked. She is the one on his checking account, and she spends his money freely. The way I see it, it is my father-in-law's choice to let her do that. He is still invited to live in my home.

Thank you to the person who said I'd be blessed in the end. I have many, many blessings in my life right now, and am grateful for them.

Anonymous said...

My father does live with my brother and grannydragon (I'll not use any family names here), however he provide more than $1200.00 per month to help provide for their household. This does not include food and medical expenses. Dad, who is capable of living on his own, sold his home and moved in with my brother in order to keep him and grannydragon for losing a home that they had purchased yet could not afford. As for why I'm on Dads checking account and credit cards, it only so that he will have some money and credit left when he may need to move to an assisted living facility. Grannydragon could possible have been a "stay-at-home sister-in-law" if she and my brother (who never finished high school) tried to live within their means and not try to impress every with money they don't have.

Anonymous said...

grannydragon- you are a contributor to the most judgemental blog in just about the history of the world. Get off your high horsey and grow up. Are you serious. "How dare you" oh my god. Also, maybe you could make more money at work if you weren't on this blog all day sweetheart.

Anonymous said...

Sister-in-law called grannydragon out for who she is. Now I understand why she is so liberal. Always looking for a handout. Don't worry Obama will redistribute some of Joe's wealth to you. Geez what a tool.

Anonymous said...

When I sent this to Mr. Joe, it was because I thought it was a nice lesson to learn proving that children DO learn what they see and grow up with. I did not send it to have people attack each other. My apologies.

Moon Willow said...

You fools, the comment from "sister-in-law" is a fake. Has it occurred to you that this imposter is not using any names because whoever made the fake comment doesn't even know the names? C'mon, out me. I dare you. Use the family name. Heck, use our first names if you don't want to use the family name. Tell me what my name is. Tell me what my your "Dad's" name is. I'll even settle for initials. C'mon, out me. You can't, because you don't know.

I bought my home 29 years ago. My husband and I have been married for ten years, and his name is not on the deed. I have never been in any danger of losing my house because I bought it before prices and interest shot up, and my payments are quite low. It will be fully paid for in four years, and is a very modest home. My husband is a college graduate. We have no fancy possessions to show off.

And, "sweetheart," I am a salaried manager. I work 45 to 50 hours a week. I spend a bit of time here because it's fun to see you pathetic people make fools of yourselves. This thread has been a real zinger.

And I see what you're doing; you're trying to draw me out into a silly, pathetic, useless argument. As Cartman would say, "Screw you guys. I'm going home."

Moon Willow said...

anon 5:54: I made the same comment to Joe. You don't owe anyone apologies; any apologies should be made by the people who used your story to attack me. But I think we both know that's not going to happen.

The story was beautiful; I loved it and I live the lesson it was meant to teach. Don't let the mean-spirted commenters rain on your parade. It's not your fault.

Anonymous said...

Blogger grannydragon said...

You fools, the comment from "sister-in-law" is a fake. Has it occurred to you that this imposter is not using any names because whoever made the fake comment doesn't even know the names?


GD you didn't use any names. How do we not know that you didn't make up this whole story?