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Sunday, June 16, 2019

I rode around San Francisco with a pool noodle attached to my bike. Here's what went down.

"F--- you, b----," a man shouts at me from the rolled-down window of his silver sedan.

We're at the intersection of Fifth and Mission. I'm stopped at the light in the right lane, astride my bicycle, and the angry silver sedan man is right behind me. He wants to turn right on red.

Under most circumstances, an obviously hurried driver such as this one would simply weave around a cyclist, scooching within inches of the bicycle to shave a few seconds off his drive time.

But angry sedan man can't get around me — at least not without some problem solving. This is because I have a bright yellow pool noodle, approximately 63 inches in length, tied to the back of my bicycle. It juts about three feet into the right lane — denoting the minimum safe passing distance for cars and bicycles, per California law.

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23 comments:

Anonymous said...

These bike rights vigilantes are the worst.

Anonymous said...

maybe the hells angels and all those other wannabe bikers should do this? would sure make the public look out for them! think the pink noodles would be better!

Anonymous said...

A bicyclist stopped at a light? No way Jose. We moved away from that poop hole but I sure remember the rudeness of the riders during the Sea Gull Century.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes when you're right you're dead right.

Anonymous said...

Man, your telling me. If you come up on some of them on a back road with their $2000 bikes and $200 bike clothes, they start moving toward the middle of the road, as If to say," I have every right to crowd you as you pass me". I have never seen them move over toward the shoulder to make more distance between my car and their bike, never. It's like they have a chip on their shoulder because I interrupted their ride coming home from work. And if they made a slip and fell in front of me, and I ran over them, there would be hell to pay. Every designated bike lane I've ever seen is to the far right of the traffic lane, which in some cases is dangerous enough. But on back roads they seem to think the bike lane is in the middle of the road endangering themselves.Share the road goes both ways.

Anonymous said...

When they start obeying the laws maybe they will get this respect they keep demanding. They roll through red lights when cars are stopped and waiting. They turn on red without stopping. They seldom hand signal their turns and are often wearing headphones. It's even worse in the cities they are actually trying to get somewhere on time and not just out excercising and the rent bikers are even less responsible and clueless.

Anonymous said...

Sea Gull Century riders are rude every year

Anonymous said...

Some drivers are idiots. Same goes for bicyclists.

Anonymous said...

$2000 bikes, gay spandex suits and matching plastic helmets with dentist mirrors attached Lol

Anonymous said...

Jerk on a bike on crowded city streets. Ain't he special? Can't ride on the sidewalks, too many homeless living there and too much poop. I don't care how much room he, or his loony city officials think he needs to ride his bike.

Anonymous said...

You idiots show exactly why bike laws are important.

744: "And if they made a slip and fell in front of me, and I ran over them, there would be hell to pay."

You are referencing back roads on the eastern shore. Pretty safe to assume you aren't talking about roads with bike lanes. It makes perfect sense that bikes are going to LAWFULLY occupy the lane without risking taking a dip or trip by riding the shoulder. Take your time and pass just like you would if it was a full blown car in front of you, just at lower speed. Sheesh it aint that hard to comprehend people

Anonymous said...

Look genius if you can't ride a bike close to the shoulder and not run off the road you need a tricycle in the driveway. Oh my, help me if I get to close to the shoulder my candy a$$ may fall off. Toughen up man!

Anonymous said...

7:44 I get you man, see it all the time. And btw 11:52, it ain't that hard to comprehend people? You drive much? You get out much? Plus I don't pass much on those back tar and chip roads, but if I do the one I'm passing is usually courteous enough to move way over out of the way. So should the bikers.

Anonymous said...

I respect people who ride bikes but I get really angry when one pops out of the bikers crowd in to the traffic lane with no warning. I don't want your death on my conscience. Think before you make a move especially in a parking lot.

Anonymous said...

Lol yep pretty tough guy but cant seem to properly steer a car around the bike. Seems you are the ones that dont need to be on the road. The law is pretty clear that bike riders on roads that lack bike lanes are to be treated like a vehicle. Soooo stop crying, learn some patience, and slow down like a good little boy.

Anonymous said...

I still say that bikes that are on public roads should have to be insured and tagged. If they want the same rights as a motor vehicle then make them comply with the same laws that motor vehicles have to

Anonymous said...

@ June 11, 2019 at 1:52 AM. Look numb nuts. Maryland law says bikes must ride as far to right of center as possible so as not to hinder the flow of traffic. You must be wearing your body suit too tight.

Anonymous said...

@ June 11, 2019 at 3:24 PM. Just move your dumb ass over like the law in Maryland says you have to. Plus treating you like a vehicle? Yeah, when you idiots follow the SAME driving laws as we do. No stopping at a red light, no stopping at a stop sign, not yielding when there is clearly a yield sign, riding between traffic, etc. You fools thinking you do not have to obey traffic laws. That self entitlement is going to get you killed.

Anonymous said...

Roads and highways are made for cars with gas tax money. How much gas tax does a bicycle produce ? Zero, so stay the f**k off the roads.

Anonymous said...

553 bwahaha fortunately your uninformed garbage opinions do not trump the established traffic laws.

Anonymous said...

Please inform me 6:21

Anonymous said...

I totally agree with 11:52. It's all about me and my bicycle, bicycle. Bwhahaha.. Idiot

Anonymous said...

San Francisco? Riding a bike? How gay is he?