Discipline
Throughout history, children have been disciplined in many different ways. Up until the second half of the twentieth century, the motto was “Spare the rod and spoil the child”. It must have worked because children seemed to behave somewhat better. A lot of this had to do with the respect the parents earned from their children. It just was not the thing to do to embarrass your parents by acting badly in public. The mutual respect that was formed in the formative years carried over to the school years. The bottom line was that you learned that what you did was bad. Nowadays, the seeming lack of conscience only regrets getting caught. As they say, the punishment doesn’t always fit the crime.
The discipline administered by the nuns at St. Francis in the 1950’s was a combination of love and fear. While you knew they loved you, there was always the threat of facing some form of corporal punishment. If you were good, the fear level was minimal, and you were always on guard to see that it didn’t elevate. There was no bleeding-heart liberal telling the nuns that they couldn’t hit you. They only resorted to a good slap if it was warranted, and the parents had enough faith in the nuns that they knew it was truly warranted. At St. Francis one time a student called a nun a liar, and she slapped him. He then proceeded to slap her back. Big mistake. The next thing we saw was a fist coming out of that black habit and connecting right on the chin. The nun calmly said, “If that’s the way you want it, let’s go.” The student said he had enough. He walked up and down the property every morning and afternoon for a half hour and during recess for a month. I don’t think they ever had a problem with him again.
My own sons asked me one time why I never hit them. I told them honestly that I loved them, and you didn’t hit someone you loved. I learned this lesson many years earlier from my Pop. One Saturday night, I came home aroundten o’clock to get more money from my room. He asked me why I was home so early, and I told him the truth. What I didn’t tell him, but he knew, was that I had previously consumed a few beers. I had left my car running in the driveway and fully expected to just jump in and carry on with my Saturday escapades after acquiring a small amount from my “stash”. When I came downstairs, he got up from his chair and calmly faced me. His exact words were, “George, I’ve never hit you, but if you attempt to go out that door, I’m going to hit you.” My reply summed up all the respect he had earned over the years. I said, “Pop, would you mind turning my car off?” He turned my car off, and I went to bed.
Discipline can be easier if there is a degree of respect earned over a period of time. I never wanted to show my parents any disrespect by doing anything that would embarrass them or the family. Of course, this applies to children after they have reached the age of reason. Before that, it’s spare the rod and spoil the child. I once heard an elderly lady explain how she disciplined her children. She would take a hairbrush and gently brush their hair. If that didn’t work, she said that she applied the other side of the brush to the other side of the child. She claimed it always worked.
(Pictured above: Sr. Mary Boniface, May 1952)
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