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Saturday, November 03, 2012

NBCU's Sandy Telethon Raises Nearly $23M for American Red Cross

NBCUniversal’s "Hurricane Sandy: Coming Together" live, one-hour benefit telethon that aired Friday, Nov. 2, generated nearly $23 million in donations for the American Red Cross.

NBCU and the American Red Cross said a record number of individual donations were received for the not-for-profit relief organization between 8 p.m. and 12 a.m. Eastern on Friday, Nov. 2 -- more website and phone traffic than any Red Cross benefit telethon over the last five years.

The event, hosted by Today anchor Matt Lauer, featured performances by Christina Aguilera (a judge on NBC'sThe Voice), Mary J. Blige, Jon Bon Jovi, Billy Joel, Joe Perry, Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band, Sting and Steven Tyler as well as appearances by Kevin Bacon, Jimmy Fallon (NBC's Late Night with Jimmy Fallon), Tina Fey, Whoopi Goldberg, Jon Stewart and NBC News' Brian Williams.

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Puppets Descend On Capital in Million Puppet March

As far as marches to the Capitol go, Saturday's rally had some memorable characters.

The so-called "Million Puppet March" set out to be a colorful and fun way of showing support for the Public Broadcasting Service.

Hundreds of supporters met at Lincoln Park, sporting sock puppets, marionettes and full-blown costumes.

Naturally, Big Bird was a popular choice.

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TORONTO ISLAMIST WEBSITE CALLS SANDY A ‘DIVINE SLAP’ IN FACE OF U.S. ‘ARROGANCE’

A pro-Islamist website in Toronto is calling Hurricane Sandy “a divine slap on the face” of American “arrogance.”
The website of Crescent International, which calls itself the “newsmagazine of the Islamic movement,” published an unsigned post which concluded by saying: “Hurricane Sandy, as a divine slap on the face of arrogance, is smashing its way through the Eastern Coast of the US.”
The post also criticizes the U.S. for allowing women the right to vote.
Canada’s National Post reports that Crescent International “often promotes the worldview of Iran’s repressive regime.” The paper writes:
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The Top Three Ways Hurricane Sandy Confirms Conservatism

For the past week, that clucking class of liberals that always seems to find itself on our television screens has hovered above the tragedy and chaos that Hurricane Sandy left in her wake, assigning points to the Dems, defeats to the GOP and validation from heaven for all its schemes and ideas.
After all, we can’t have a weather event without the reliable street preachers chiming in, saying climate is not the same as weather except in the cases that promote their ideology, and proclaiming that if only America sacrificed its industry on the altar of environmentalism, the storm gods would show mercy. See, with these clowns, there isn’t an event on the damn planet — from wildfires to home runs — that doesn’t confirm their world view. And we know this, and we deal with this.

CLINTON AIDE TRIES NEW POSITION

A former Democratic aide to Bill and Hillary Clinton is throwing her support behind Mitt Romney in the presidential election, arguing Romney can offer “bipartisan leadership.”
“I know what it means to work across the aisle on issues that are important to the American people,” Gigi Georges, the former Executive Director of the New York State Democratic Party, said Saturday. “And that’s why I am supporting Mitt Romney.”
Georges, a former special assistant to President Clinton, worked on domestic policy issues for the National Economic Council. She also worked in Hillary Clinton’s Senate office as state director.
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Maryland Sending More Resources to New York and New Jersey to Assist with Recovery Efforts in the Wake of Hurricane Sandy

REISTERSTOWN, MD (November 3, 2012) – Twenty-five troopers from the Maryland State Police and four employees from Baltimore City will be heading north to help the states of New Jersey and New York with recovery efforts in the wake of Hurricane Sandy. They will be joining 23 emergency medical providers from various parts of the state that deployed earlier in the week and are providing service in northern New Jersey.
“As we were preparing for Hurricane Sandy, several other states came to Maryland with personnel and equipment to help with water rescues and operating emergency operations centers,” said Governor Martin O’Malley. “We are thankful that we are now able to return the favor in states to our north which suffered more damage from Sandy.”
The troopers are being sent to Fort Dix in central New Jersey, where they will be deployed to assist local law enforcement officers, primarily in Monmouth and Ocean counties. The Baltimore City personnel, led by Robert Maloney of the Mayor’s Office of Emergency Management and Public Safety, will be assisting staff in the New York State Emergency Operations Center in Albany. They comprise an Incident Management Assist Team (IMAT).
Ten two-person advanced life support ambulances and three supervisors went to New Jersey on Thursday. After originally staging at the Atlantic County Training Center near Atlantic City, they were sent to MetLife Stadium in northern New Jersey. Most of their work has been in Jersey City, N.J. The team includes units from private service Life Star and public safety units from Baltimore City and Talbot and Washington counties.

Volunteers Continue to Clean up Crisfield




65 people showed up today to volunteer
WHAT IS NEEDED
Appliances mainly refrigerators, furniture, mattresses, linens including pillows are some of the things that are needed.
They also need building supplies  drywall, plywood and insulation. Right now they seem  to have enough food and the only clothing they are requesting is NEW underwear .
 The above items are a priority right now.  

All polling centers will be open Tuesday in Crisfield

Delaware Veterans Association  were there today to bury the caskets that were forced up due to the flooding.

Home Depot delivered 3 truck loads of building material today. 

No more donations of water is needed at this time. 

Sandy Took Major Toll On Assateague Island’s Federal Side

BERLIN -- After a few days to survey damage from Hurricane Sandy, parts of Assateague Island National Seashore will be open today.

The North Ocean Beach parking area is expected to open for day use visitation Friday, Nov. 3 at noon.

The Verrazano Bridge has been checked out by the Maryland Department of Transportation and deemed safe for vehicular traffic.

 More

How A Blanket Changed His Life

A Tale Of Two Economies


Anheuser-Busch Donating Drinking Water, Plus $100K, To Help Sandy Victims

 Anheuser-Busch is sending its support to those affected by Hurricane Sandy in the form of 44,000 cases — 1,056,000 cans — of emergency drinking water and a generous monetary donation to the American Red Cross.
The brewing company has already shipped 4,000 cases to two New Jersey distributors — Harrison Beverage in Pleasantville, N.J., and Ritchie & Page Distributing in Robbinsville, N.J. — that should be available to the American Red Cross and other local disaster relief organizations today. Another 10,000 will be delivered to Floyd Bennett Field in Brooklyn over the weekend.
"Relief workers and people in the region are in need of safe, clean drinking water, and Anheuser-Busch is in a unique position to produce and ship large quantities of emergency drinking water," said Peter Kraemer, VP supply for Anheuser-Busch. "Our local distributors help identify those communities most in need and work with relief organizations, such as the American Red Cross, to make sure the water gets where it's needed."
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Before and After Aerial Images of Sandy's Damage

The National Oceanic Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) has released aerial imagery showing the damage left behind by Sandy

 CLICK HERE to see the pictures.

Presidential Polls 2012: Obama's Battleground Advantage Holds

WASHINGTON -- The veritable fire hose of data turned on in the final days of the 2012 campaign leaves little doubt that while the national popular vote remains too close to call, President Barack Obama holds slim but meaningful leads over Republican nominee Mitt Romney in the battleground states that will likely decide the presidential election.
With just three days remaining before votes are counted, most of the national tracking polls continue to show a basically deadlocked race, with six new surveys released in the last 24 hours showing roughly the same findings as those from earlier in the week.
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OHIO: ROMNEY DRAWS 30,000, OBAMA DRAWS 2800

As Chuck Todd and NBC release their juicy-juiced-juicery from a propagandist named Marist predicting Obama will nearly double his 2008 turnout advantage with a D+9 poll, in his first trip to Ohio since Hurricane Sandy, Mitt Romney attracted a jaw-dropping crowd of 30,000 at a rally Friday evening.

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State police: Do not leave cars idling in cold weather

Drivers who idle their cars to warm them up invite thieves and could face fines this winter, Maryland State Police warns.

The agency launched a campaign warning drivers that running cars are an easy target for criminals prowling neighborhoods, gas stations and grocery stores. Leaving a car running and unoccupied can also result in a $70 fine and one point on the driver's record.

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O'Malley Orders Tolls Waived, Restrictions Lifted For Trucks Heading North

The State of Maryland is waiving tolls, weight requirements and permitting for trucks traveling through Maryland that are carrying relief supplies to New York and New Jersey, the areas ravaged by Superstorm Sandy.
The Maryland State Highway Administration says that, as of 3 p.m. today,  Governor Martin O'Malley has waived tolls for utility trucks, emergency vehicles and vehicles carrying relief supplies.
The toll waiver will remain in effect until 3 p.m. Tuesday.
“All reasonable steps must be taken to assist relief efforts in the wake of this unprecedented storm,” said Governor O’Malley in a news release.
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Rumors Become Reality

The Red Cross and Salvation Army who are stationed at the Crisfield Community Center will in fact shut down food distribution at 5pm  today.  
We want to thank all the volunteer that have shown up today to help with this massive cleaned up.

NY Governor: 8M Gallons of Gasoline Delivered

Gov. Andrew Cuomo has a message for New Yorkers in long gas lines: Help is on the way.

Cuomo said Saturday that the gas shortage brought about by the superstorm was due to tankers being held in the harbor and not allowed to make deliveries. He said state and government officials had been working with the Coast Guard to get those tankers released.

He said 8 million gallons of fuel had been delivered and another 28 million will be delivered over the next few days

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NYC Marathon Runners Donate Hotel Rooms to Sandy Victims

In the wake of the announcement that the New York City marathon has been canceled, a new kind of help has sprung up for Sandy victims, in the form of hotel rooms.

Race2Recover NYC is facilitating the transfer of hotel reservations from marathon runners who would otherwise have to cancel them to victims of Sandy's wrath, those who have lost their homes.

For marathoners who are interested, Race2Recover makes it easy. People who want to donate their hotel rooms can just pass along the info for their reservation and the group makes all the phone calls to arrange it.

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Reid Says He Can't Work With Romney

Five days before the election, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid has ruled out trying to work with Mitt Romney should he win next week.
"Mitt Romney's fantasy that Senate Democrats will work with him to pass his 'severely conservative' agenda is laughable," Mr. Reid said in a statement on Friday, trying to puncture Mr. Romney's closing election argument that he'll be able to deliver on the bipartisanship President Obama promised in 2008 but has struggled to live up to.
Mr. Reid, a Nevada Democrat and a Mormon, like Mr. Romney, has become the Republican presidential nominee's chief critic this campaign, at one point accusing him of failing to pay taxes — a charge that Mr. Romney has refuted.
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Big Democratic Guns Tell Seniors Anti-Casino Ads Are Misleading



In the battle for expanded casino gambling, they brought out the big political guns Thursday to persuade hundreds of residents of the large Leisure World retirement community in Montgomery County that ads against Question 7 ads are misleading and dishonest.

Maryland Lt. Gov. Anthony Brown, Montgomery County Executive Ike Leggett and Sen. Roger Manno — all Democrats — told the seniors that building a world-class casino at National Harbor in Prince George’s County will have positive impacts on the state’s economy and education funding.

“We may not change your minds,” Brown said. “But nobody should leave this room today without having the facts and that’s what we are here to do, to dispel a lot of the myths that have been promoted to try to oppose Question 7.”


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‘Puppet March’ To Defend PBS Funding At U.S. Capitol

Organizers of a Million Puppet March are announcing their plans for a Washington rally three days before the election to support funding for public broadcasting.
The march of puppets and puppeteers is planned for Saturday. It begins at 10 a.m. at Lincoln Park east of the Capitol. About 600 participants will later march around the Capitol to the Capitol Reflecting Pool.
Organizers say they wanted to respond to Mitt Romney’s plan to eliminate funding for PBS and its shows and characters like Big Bird on “Sesame Street” as a way to reduce the nation’s deficit.
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MD Sends EMS Workers To Help Garrett County

 Garrett County by far got hit the hardest in Maryland; heavy snows blocking roads and trapping people, a situation so dire the county put a call out for help...and the state's other jurisdictions answered.
"Really everything that they've asked for.  Anything that you need, just call us and we will send them right out," said Howard County Executive Ken Ulman. 
Howard County was one of those governments that sent aid to Garrett.
Ulman says after seeing

Coyotes Trapped Near Elementary School

Although some recently trapped coyotes in Worcester County had eaten kittens and at least one cat, people should not be unduly alarmed, according to a state wildlife expert.

Anyone who sees a coyote should realize “they are just another part of nature,” said Denny Price, a wildlife technician with the Wildlife and Heritage Division of the Maryland Department of Natural Resources, on Wednesday.

In some cases, they can become a nuisance.

In September, an owner of property near Showell Elementary School saw coyotes on his land and contacted his caretaker, who contacted Gene Garrett, a Willards resident who has a license to trap nuisance animals and is a director of the National Trappers Association.

Gushing Susquehanna Called A Bigger Threat To Bay Pollution Than Local Runoff

The millions of gallons of water laden with polluted sediment pouring from the Conowingo Dam on the Susquehanna River after Superstorm Sandy are a far bigger problem for the Chesapeake Bay than local stormwater runoff, Republican elected officials said during a press conference Thursday.

Standing in the spray from the gushing dam as huge flocks of seagulls and a bald eagle dove for fish, the officials complained that the federal Environmental Protection Agency’s mandatory pollution reduction will cost local taxpayers hundreds of millions of dollars while the Susquehanna pollution is being ignored.

Harford County Executive David Craig said, “One storm like this completely does away with 20 years of work” on local pollution controls.


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Gov. Christie Orders Gas Rationing For Parts of NJ

If you're planning to line up for gas Saturday, better check your license plate first.

New Jersey is moving to an odd-even gas rationing system in 12 counties starting at noon.

Gov. Chris Christie ordered the system late Friday.

He says it will help ease fuel shortages and extended lines for gasoline that have occurred since Superstorm Sandy decimated the coast.

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Forecasters: New, Lesser Storm May Hit East Coast

Another messy - and wintry - storm may cause post-Election Day problems for an already weather-weary East Coast, forecasters say.

But meteorologists add that it's six days out, so that's rather early to get too worried. The forecast could change before it hits late next week.

The National Weather Service's forecast center in College Park, Md., which watches winter storms, put out a long-range notice Thursday saying a nor'easter was possible for mid-Atlantic and New England states by Election Day through next Thursday.

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CASINO NIGHT NOVEMBER 10TH


MARDELA SPRINGS VOL. FIRE CO. WILL BE HOLDING A

ALL YOU CAN EAT
STEAMED SHRIMP & FRIED CHICKEN DINNER
&
CASINO NIGHT
SATURDAY NOVEMBER 10, 2012
AT THE MARDELA SPRINGS FIRE CO.

DINNER SERVED FROM 6:00 PM UNTIL 8:00 PM
CASINO NIGHT 8:00 PM UNTIL 12:00 AM

COST IS $ 25.00 FOR ALL
$ 10.00 FOR CASINO NIGHT ONLY
( MUST BE 21 FOR CASINO NIGHT )

BEER & SODA WILL BE PROVIDED
CASH BAR

SEE ANY FIREMAN FOR TICKETS AND INFORMATIOM OR
CALL THE FIREHOUSE AT 410-749-5997 OR 443-880-4594

50-50 POKER BLACKJACK BEAT THE DEALER
INSTANT BINGO
ALL PROCEEDS BENEFIT THE MARDELA SPRINGS VOL. FIRE CO.

A Viewer Writes, "I Don't Understand"?


HISTORICAL MOMENTS BY GEORGE CHEVALLIER 11-3-12


The Salisbury City Bus

When I started going to St. Francis de Sales Catholic School, it had just opened in September of 1950. Now this was before the days of 2-car families, and I lived on the other side of town. Since I was only in the second grade, this should have been a problem and it would be nowadays. But, times were different and we had the city bus line to depend upon. There were four routes and they all started downtown. The two buses with the routes going up North Division St. and out East Church St. parked on the East side of Division St. in front of the Court House. The two busses going outSouth Division St. and down Camden Ave. started their runs from in front of the Masonic Building directly across from the Court House.
          
My day began standing on the NE corner of Church and Truitt Streets accompanied by the cement-posted, ever-present U.S. Mail box, where I would deposit anything my mother entrusted to me. My sister, Barbara, would get on the bus across the street and in front of our grandparents house and her friend, Charlotte Wallace, would get on 2 blocks away at the corner of Truitt and Grace Streets. By doing this they would have the long way out to Chesapeake Heights in which to talk “girl talk”. I was fortunate in that the Church St. bus became the Camden Ave. bus upon its arrival at the downtown bus stop. I just stayed on the bus and continued on my journey to St. Francis. In the afternoon I boarded the Camden Ave. bus in front of St. Francis and stayed on it until it deposited me back to the corner of Church and Truitt Streets. In the seven years that I rode the bus there were only two drivers that had the route I rode. First, there was an elderly man known to us kids only as “Shorty”. When he retired, the route was taken over by Harlan Lane. I have vague recollections of a driver named “Tex”. He didn’t drive for very long and was called “Tex” because, with his long black hair and cowboy “looks”, it fit. The kids also said he had a pistol under his seat but none of us were brave enough to ask or find out by any other means.
          
The cost of a weekly pass was fifty cents when we first started riding the bus. This went up to seventy-five cents after a couple of years and finally ended up during my elementary career at the princely sum of one dollar and twenty-five cents for the entire week – both ways. The pass was purchased on Monday and punched by the driver every time you used it. Tokens didn’t come into play until 1959, two years after I left St. Francis.
          
In the heyday of the Salisbury bus line, you could get anywhere in town quickly and on time. The busses left the downtown area on the hour and half-hour and were fairly punctual. Most of the residents of Salisbury lived near one of the four main arteries and could walk to the bus stop with no problem.

Ocean City Employee Union?


Friday November 2nd 2012 From Ocean City Today Newspaper
Ocean City Government Salaries
Below are the top 106 earners.  Police & Fire/Ems already have a union. 
Now the rest of the towns employees want a union.  To these salaries add
an additional 50% for pension, health care costs & other fringe benefits. 
VOTE NO TO MORE UNIONS IN OCEAN CITY.

CITY MANAGER .........................173,404.80
PUBLIC WORKS DIRECTOR ................152,669.64
FINANCE ADMINISTRATOR ................146,860.93
CITY ENGINEER ........................146,860.43
CHIEF OF POLICE ......................144,676.89
RECREATION/PARKS DIRECTOR ............140,321.75
PLANNING & COMM DEV DIRECTOR .........140,321.46
EMERGENCY SERVICES DIRECTOR ..........140,150.34
FIRE MARSHAL .........................135,445.22
POLICE CAPTAIN........................132,617.77
POLICE CAPTAIN........................126,743.38
POLICE CAPTAIN........................123,803.60
POLICE CAPTAIN........................123,328.39
INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY DIR ...........121,828.01
GENERAL SERVICES DIRECTOR ............118,892.80
PW SENIOR PROJECT MANAGER.............118,541.49
ZONING ADMINISTRATOR .................116,773.06
FIRE/EMS DEPUTY CHIEF ................116,561.04
TRANS SUPER...........................114,746.27
PW DEPUTY DIRECTOR ...................114,400.00
RISK/CLAIMS MANAGER...................113,846.15
POLICE OFFICER .......................113,654.21
POLICE SERGEANT.......................112,902.18
WASTEWATER SUPERINTENDENT.............112,553.76
POLICE LIEUTENANT.....................111,060.18
CONVENTION CENTER DIRECTOR ...........110,441.00
POLICE LIEUTENANT.....................110,198.26
POLICE SERGEANT ......................110,147.23
HUMAN RESOURCE DIRECTOR ..............110,000.73
GOLF SUPERINTENDENT ..................109,193.03
ELECTRONIC SERVICES MANAGER ..........108,953.07
POLICE LIEUTENANT.....................108,715.45
FF/EMS 2ND LIEUTENANT ................108,455.06
POLICE CORPORAL ......................107,896.52
POLICE LIEUTENANT ....................106,798.83
POLICE LIEUTENANT ....................106,174.58
POLICE LIEUTENANT ....................106,101.83
FIRE MARSHAL/DEPUTY CHIEF ............106,079.84
PW CHIEF DEPUTY DIRECTOR .............106,004.49
BUDGET MANAGER .......................105,817.00
POLICE SERGEANT.......................105,732.65
RECREATION/PARKS ASST DIRECTOR .......104,114.08
POLICE SERGEANT ......................103,951.94
ASSISTANT FINANCE ADMINISTRATOR ......103,947.78
FF/EMS 2ND LIEUTENANT ................103,433.64
POLICE SERGEANT ......................102,788.29
CONVENTION OPERATIONS MANAGER ........102,432.47
POLICE SERGEANT ......................102,018.75
POLICE LIEUTENANT ....................101,634.12
POLICE LIEUTENANT.....................100,815.17
CONVENTION SALES/MARKETING DIR .......100,139.11
PW MAINTENANCE MANAGER ................99,171.67
POLICE LIEUTENANT .....................98,584.78
FIRE/EMS ASSISTANT CHIEF ..............98,468.62
FIRE/EMS LIEUTENANT ...................98,331.83
SPECIAL EVENTS DIRECTOR ...............98,066.39
FIREFIGHTER/EMT IV.....................97,917.85
POLICE SERGEANT .......................97,392.00
POLICE OFFICER ........................97,305.75
SERGEANT ..............................97,201.11
FF/EMS 2ND LIEUTENANT .................97,141.47
PW CONSTRUCTION MANAGER ...............97,086.10
POLICE CORPORAL .......................96,578.88
CHIEF BUILDING OFFICIAL ...............96,363.51
POLICE SERGEANT .......................95,965.90
FIRE/EMS LIEUTENANT ...................95,884.27
POLICE OFFICER FIRST CLASS ............95,668.59
FIREFIGHTER/EMT IV ....................95,494.39
POLICE SERGEANT .......................94,559.79
PARKS SUPERINTENDENT ..................94,112.25
POLICE OFFICER FIRST CLASS ............93,961.25
FIREFIGHTER/EMT IV ....................93,443.18
FIREFIGHTER/EMT IV ....................92,126.79
FIREFIGHTER/EMT IV.....................91,928.81
CITY CLERK ............................91,743.69
FIREFIGHTER/EMT IV ....................91,729.54
FF/EMS 2ND LIEUTENANT..................91,605.78
POLICE OFFICER FIRST CLASS.............91,518.83
POLICE CORPORAL........................91,497.41
COMMUNICATIONS DIVISION MGR ...........91,437.76
FIREFIGHTER/EMT IV.....................90,818.71
ENGINEERING MANAGER ...................90,641.28
GOLF PROFESSIONAL/MGR .................90,572.99
FIRE/EMS CAPTAIN.......................90,504.00
FIRE/EMS CAPTAIN.......................90,503.90
FIRE/EMS CAPTAIN.......................90,503.85
POLICE CORPORAL........................90,248.81
POLICE CORPORAL........................89,220.94
FIREFIGHTER/EMT IV.....................89,103.53
FIREFIGHTER/EMT IV.....................89,016.33
POLICE CORPORAL........................88,997.91
POLICE SERGEANT........................88,981.66
POLICE SERGEANT........................88,804.80
POLICE OFFICER FIRST CLASS.............88,680.56
FIREFIGHTER/EMT IV.....................88,444.03
FIRE/EMS CAPTAIN……………….88,275.08
TOURISM DIRECTOR……………..87,697.86
WASTWATER ASS. SUPT…………87,624,55
POLICE CORPORAL……………….87,295.81
POLICE OFFER FIRST CLASS……87,118.06
SPECIAL PROGRAMS MANAGER….85,868.51
POLICE SERGEANT………………..85,495.31
DEPUTY FIRE MARSHALL……….85006.17
WATER SUPERINTENDENT………84,590.82
FLEET SERVICES MANAGER……84,230.39
GIS COORDINATOR……………….83,397.56

Its That Time Of Year

Handmade Holiday Crafts Featured At Fair in Ocean Pines

 Forty local artisans and businesses will be selling their original works at the third annual Winter Wonderland Holiday Craft Fair at the Ocean Pines Community Center on Saturday, Nov. 3.

“It gives people in the area an opportunity to attend a fair where everything is handmade,” said Carol Quinto, cochairperson of the event and a member of the Pine’eer Arts & Crafts Club, which is sponsoring the fair.

Between 10 a.m. to 4 p.m., the public can stroll the Community Center, which will be filled with vendors selling original, holiday crafts such as wreaths, photographs, handmade soap, jewelry and stained glass. There will be no charge for admission.

Most vendors are private artists, but some area businesses will participate as well. Before being accepted to sell their crafts at the fair, vendors’ applications are reviewed to ensure what is being sold meets appropriate guidelines to provide a wide array of items for attendees.

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Hello Americans, I'm Paul Harvey


April 3, 1965.  

If I were the devil…

If I were the prince of darkness I’d want to engulf the whole world in darkness, and I’d have a third of its real estate and four fifths of its population. But I wouldn’t be happy until I had seized the ripest apple on the tree: thee.
So I’d set about however necessary, to take over the United States . I’d subvert the churches first. I’d begin with a campaign of whispers. With the wisdom of a serpent I would whisper to you as I whispered to Eve, “Do as you please.” To the young I would whisper that the Bible is a myth. I would convince them that man created God, instead of the other way around. I would confide that what’s bad is good, and what’s good is square. And the old I would teach to pray after me, “our father which art in Washington …”
And then I’d get organized: I’d educate authors in how to make lurid literature exciting so that anything else would appear dull and uninteresting. I’d threaten TV with dirtier movies, and visa versa. I’d peddle narcotics to whom I could. I’d sell alcohol to ladies and gentlemen of distinction. I’d tranquilize the rest with pills.
If I were the devil I’d soon have families at war with themselves; churches at war with themselves; and nations at war with themselves; until each in its turn was consumed. And with promises of higher ratings, I’d have mesmerizing media fanning the flames.
If I were the devil I would encourage schools to refine young intellect, but neglect to discipline emotions; just let those run wild, until before you knew it you’d have to have drug-sniffing dogs and metal detectors at every schoolhouse door.
Within a decade I’d have prisons overflowing; I’d have judges promoting pornography. Soon I could evict God from the courthouse, then from the schoolhouse, and then from the houses of Congress. And in His own churches I would substitute psychology for religion and deify science. I would lure priests and pastors into misusing boys and girls—and church money.
If I were the devil I’d make the symbol of Easter an egg, and the symbol of Christmas a bottle.
If I were the devil I’d take from those who have, and give to those who want it, until I had killed the incentive of the ambitious. And what’ll you bet I couldn’t get whole states to promote gambling as the way to get rich.
I would caution against extremes, and hard work, and patriotism, and moral conduct. I would convince the young that marriage is old fashioned—that swinging is more fun. That what you see on TV is the way to be. And thus I could undress you in public, and I could lure you into bed with diseases for which there is no cure.
In other words, if I were the devil I would just keep on doing what he is doing.