Three Questions for a Redneck Engineer

Question # 1??:  
How much does a house weigh?   
Question # 2??: 
How much weight can a rural two-lane bridge hold??? 



and
Question # 3??: WOULD THIS BE COVERED BY HOME INSURANCE, CAR INSURANCE,
OR, DOES IT COME UNDER ROADSIDE ASSISTANCE ??? 

Y' ALL HAVE A GREAT DAY NOW, YA' HEAR!!!