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Wednesday, March 08, 2017

Dating Ads for Seniors, found in a Florida Newspaper

'The Villages' Dating Ads

These are actual ads seen in ''The Villages'' Florida newspaper.

Who says seniors don't have a sense of humor

FOXY LADY

Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim, 5'4' (used to be 5'6'),

Searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion.

Matching white shoes and belt a plus.
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LONG-TERM COMMITMENT

Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband,
Looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot.

Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath, not a problem.
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SERENITY NOW

I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga, and meditation.

If you are the silent type, let's get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.
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WINNING SMILE

Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.
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BEATLES OR STONES

I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights
and still like to play the guitar. If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let's get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.
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MEMORIES

I can usually remember Monday through Thursday.

If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads together
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My favorite

MINT CONDITION

Male, 1932 model, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition, but walks well.

AND FINALLY

A lady in the Villages in Florida (a senior retirement community), was sitting on a bench, near another bench with a gentleman sitting on the bench.

She asked him if he was new to the community and he said "no, I have owned a condo here for 20 years".

She then said "I have been here for 15 years and I have never seen you around!".

He then said "I have been in prison for the last 17 years!".

She was stunned and finally asked him what he had done.

He said that he had murdered his first wife!

She was stunned again and after a long pause she said.

So you're SINGLE???

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I thought this was an ad from members of congress.