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Saturday, January 25, 2014

6 Habits Of Instantly Likeable People

When you meet someone, after, "What do you do?" you're out of things to say.

You suck at small talk, and those first five minutes are tough because you're a little shy and a little insecure.

But you want to make a good impression. You want people to genuinely like you.

Here's how remarkably likeable people do it:

1. They lose the power pose.

I know: Your parents taught you to stand tall, square your shoulders, stride purposefully forward, drop your voice a couple of registers, and shake hands with a firm grip.

It's great to display nonverbal self-confidence, but go too far and it seems like you're trying to establish your importance. That makes the "meeting" seem like it's more about you than it is the other person—and no one likes that.

No matter how big a deal you are you pale in comparison to say, oh, Nelson Mandela. So take a cue from him. Watch how he greets Bill Clinton, no slouch at this either.

Clinton takes a step forward (avoiding the "you must come to me" power move); Mandela steps forward with a smile and bends slightly forward as if, ever so slightly, to bow (a clear sign of deference and respect in nearly every culture); Clinton does the same. What you have are two important people who put aside all sense of self-importance or status. They're genuine.

Next time you meet someone, relax, step forward, tilt your head towards them slightly, smile, and show that you're the one who is honored by the introduction—not them.

We all like people who like us. If I show you I'm genuinely happy to meet you, you'll instantly start to like me. (And you'll show that you do, which will help calm my nerves and let me be myself.)

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3 comments:

  1. Give me someone who can actually do something for me and I can shine with the best of them.The majority of the people I meet have absolutely nothing to offer.When I volunteer in homeless shelters and soup kitchens I see everyone at face value.They aren't putting on airs or pretending to be something they aren't.When I'm not with those people I'm actually trying to better my own self.

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  2. Ha! Clinton is "genuine." That's rich!!!

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  3. A must read by county department heads.

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