In your great grandparents’ heyday, most women were stay-at-home moms and uneducated men, who made up the majority of men back then, were able to support themselves, a wife and their kids by working hard at what we’d today consider to be menial jobs. Back then, relationships were more about raising a family and making a living than love. That doesn’t mean there wasn’t any love involved; it just means the motivations was often a little different than it is today. Women wanted to get out of the house and have kids. When a woman found a man who treated her well and seemed like he could provide for her and her children, that was often enough of a foundation to build a marriage on. After all, the country was much poorer then; so her parents couldn’t necessarily support her and she didn’t have a lot of job options. A husband was the best financial option most women had back then.
It’s a plus that women have made strides in education and the work place and now, most ladies don’t NEED a guy to take care of them. If you have a daughter, this is a good thing. You wouldn’t want your little girl trapped in a lousy relationship someday because she can’t possibly take care of herself. However, there have been negative consequences to that as well. Since many women can take care of themselves and those that can’t have the federal government helping them, they don’t NEED a man to take care of them financially. Combine this with the fact that financial opportunities for uneducated and unskilled men are dramatically reduced from pre-shipping container/pre-computer age and marriage has been forever changed. That male dockworker can no longer support a family by himself and even if the female executive were to marry him (and she probably wouldn’t because he has less status than her), the marriage would be far less stable because financial need wouldn’t hold them together.
Divorce also happened much less frequently in the past. Not only was it a little scandalous to get divorced, you didn’t have big daddy government stepping in to pay the woman’s bills if a woman decided to go her own way. Consider that, “the 1967 crude (divorce) rate was 8.7 times as large as that for 1867” and it becomes obvious that marriage meant a lot more to previous generations of Americans.
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I couldn't refrain from commenting. Well written!
ReplyDeleteand thats why this countrys gone to hell
ReplyDeletePre nup, pre nup, pre nup.
ReplyDeleteWorthless,worthless,worthless.
DeleteWhat about the gay male marriage ? Frank
ReplyDeleteYou can marry who you want Frank....
ReplyDeleteSeriously dude -
ReplyDeleteI was left standing with two children to raise while Daddio did his own thing. I admit that being married wasn't a matter of "need" as much as what I thought was love, but children DO NEED their mothers AND FATHERS to be together for the stability it provides. Granted, we and they can manage but there are huge discrepancies in a life without stability.
The government never paid a single one of my bills, and for the most part neither did my children's biological sperm donor. This post is Spot OFF - but that's to be expected from your negative view of society and particularly the Smallsbury vicinity, Joe.
I say it ain't so - Women do "need" men to take CARE of them as well, men "need" women to take CARE of them too. It's not about the money or the education, it's about the core of a human knowing that you're part of something bigger than oneself.
So men, hear this loud and clear - NO we don't need you for your paycheck - we NEED you for your personality, your skills, your passions, your companionship, your point of view, your kindness, your laughter, your hugs, your cooking, and your cooing in our ears ... we do still have those needs.
Man UP
Awesome, couldn't have said it better ! My great Granny had a husband who beat her and the kids and cheated also. The government didn't pay for her neither did her husband, she divorced and married a REAL man who loved her and was a true father to her kids, hats off to good men and women who know what it means to be married
DeleteThis post is Spot OFF - but that's to be expected from your negative view of society and particularly the Smallsbury vicinity, Joe.
ReplyDeleteHave you and others ever wondered why Joe, and so many others, have a negative view of smallsbury? Just open your eyes and ears when you drive around that slum. Listen to how people talk around there and on HERE. Y'all made your own beds.
Still doesn't address us Gay males. Frank
ReplyDelete