IF I HAD A SON

The media controversy sparked by Barack Obama’s statement ‘If I had a son, he’d look like Trayvon’ has prompted many prominent citizens to come to his defense by declaring, in the I-am-Spartacus fashion, “If I also had a son…”:

Nancy Pelosi: “… he’d owe China $256,000,000 before he reaches puberty.”

George Soros: “… he’d own a chauffeured tricycle.”

Bill Clinton: “… he’d know what ‘is’ is.”

Hillary Clinton: “I already have a son and his name is Bill.”

Michael Bloomberg: “… he wouldn’t be eating trans fats – or he’d be out of the will.”

Harry Reid: “… he wouldn’t smell like the unwashed masses visiting the Capitol.”

Sheriff Joe Arpaio: “… his birth certificate wouldn’t have PDF layers.”

Donald Trump: “What Sheriff Joe said.”

Al Sharpton: “… he wouldn’t be a honky or one of them Jews.”

Michael Moore: “… I wouldn’t eat him as long as he doesn’t get between me and the fridge.”

Joe Biden: “I have a son? Have we met?”

Rosie O’Donnell: “… I’d keep him in a cage and train him to attack toupees, and then I’d invite Donald Trump over and open the cage.”

Oprah: “… I’d keep him away from Rosie O’Donnell.”

Anita Dunn: “… I’d name him Mao Tse-Dunn.”

Eric Holder: “… I’d tell him he was conceived during fast and furious sex, then I’d smuggle him into Mexico.”

More