Taliban

A fleeing Taliban, desperate for water, was plodding through the Afghanistan desert when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he hurried toward the object, only to find a little old Jewish man at a small stand selling ties.

The Taliban asked, Do you have water?

The Jewish man replied, I have no water. Would you like to buy a tie? They are only $5.

The Taliban shouted, "Idiot! I do not need an over-priced tie. I need water! I should kill you, but I must find water first!"

OK, said the old Jewish man, it does not matter that you do not want to buy a tie and that you hate me. I will show you that I am bigger than that.

If you continue over that hill to the east for about two miles, you will find a lovely restaurant run by my brother. It has all the ice cold water you need. Shalom.

Muttering, the Taliban staggered away over the hill. Several hours later he staggered back, almost dead. Your ****ing brother won't let me in without a tie!