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Monday, November 24, 2008

Let's clear this up once and for all.

Obama's birth certificate is being held safely in a vault next to Elvis' house in the Tennessee mountains, where Bigfoot stands guard.

The Loch Ness Monster lives in the king's enormous guitar-shaped swimming pool, next to the pool house, where Jimmy Hoffa likes to crash when coming by to visit "OJ's real killers."

You people are all crackheads.
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Posted in response to Pastor Mannings request that President Elect Obama produce his birth certificate.

22 comments:

  1. Boss,
    Why are you so confident that we have not been told a lie? Is it because you heard it on the Main Stream Media? Real News information is only available on the internet. Once a controversy is exposed on the internet, the MSM makes an effort to discredit it by making fun of it, and so on. If the story has no merit, then, why won't Obama release the original birth certificate? Aren't you also, at least a little bit, curious?

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  2. Yeah but did he register for the selective service?

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  3. Hey Boss, is the vault you are talking about the one in the UFO garage?

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  4. This was a reader staement I reposted.

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  5. 3:35,

    Did you get all that from the aliens who abducted you? The "MSM" can't be trusted? Only real news is found on the Internet? Yeah, just today, I found a great website that told me the gub'ment blew up the twin towers with controlled demos! And the "MSM" isn't covering that at all! BASTARDS!

    Seek therapy

    3:35 (part deux),

    Yes, he registered for the Selective Service. And yes, he released all of his medical records. And, yes, he released all of his academic records.

    You guys are getting seriously unhinged (and the first one sounds delusional)

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  6. The truth is Obama was not born, he was created in a lab out in Nevada, Area 51 I believe.

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  7. Anon 352 Would you like to bet on that Obama troll? Check Wiki answers, the Question is What were Barack's grades in college? And the answer is HE HASN"T RELEASED THEM. No one knows because they are still UNRELEASED> Just like his full medical hisory, not a one page summary. You freakin Obama trolls know it all.

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  8. Anon 3:35 - Prove it!

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  9. 3:52 No he did not release his ,edical records,no he did not release his college records and no he has not released his original birth certificate and the selective service record he released was apparently fake. Please tell me why every legal U.S. citizen would not want to know if he really is eligible to be president. If this were Bush and there was any question at all the alleged main stream media as well as the left wing blogosphere would be going nuts. Please just produce the birth cert and put this issue to rest.

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  10. Sorry anon 3:35 Anon 3:52 - you prove it.

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  11. Barack Obama wasn't born, per se. He was created in a secret ultra-liberal Democratic National Party laboratory by combining active yogurt cultures, Roswell alien DNA and a box of double-stuff OREOs, and as en embryo was fed a constant audio reel of MLK speeches.

    Crackheads, seriously, get over it. You can call him President Obama now.

    CC

    PS: thanx 4 tha shoutout BossHogg

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  12. CC - check your facts. We can't even call him President Elect until December 15. And, we have a president right now. It's not Obama. So, I won't be calling him president anything before January. Thanx!

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  13. CC:

    I think your responses have been the most "in tune" with the spirit we have been posting.

    But you forgot to mention that the birth certificate could be stored 7-stories down under lock and key by EG&G contractors at Area 51.

    It would be nice to have the answers but we know it aint gonna happen...

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  14. It was the proffessor with the candle-stick in the white house.

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  15. If he has a US birth certificate why wont he just disclose it and end all the innuendo?The secrecy makes me doubt ....

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  16. Take a deep breath, nuts, and say it with me: "President Barack Obama." Start saying it quietly now so you can get used to it come January.

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  17. 4:30,

    Are you really trying to quote Wikipedia on a contentious issue?

    you = fail at the Internet

    Please try again.

    In addition, I would say an "obama troll" is someone who posts stupid bs like 'Oh noes! Obama wasn't born here!

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  18. 4:36,

    He doesn't have an original birth certificate. But the State of Hawai'i has released the copies, MULTIPLE TIMES.

    I don't have my original birth certificate, and would have to request a copy from the State...

    ...does that mean I wasn't born in the US?

    idiot.

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  19. bluto,

    What is wrong with you people? Seriously.

    The State of Hawai'i has produced a copy of the birth certificate from their records.

    Seriously. SERIOUSLY. Go contact Hawai'i. Or is this a conspiracy? Does Obama hold sway over the records department of one of the States?

    C'mon, folks. This sh*t is getting ridiculous.

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  20. Where's your proof the state of Hawaii has delivered such evidence? You people are so sold on such BS! IF what you're saying were true, why hasn't Obama come forward and said, LOOK, let's put al this crap to rest. Here's my Birth Certificate, here's evidence that it's real, end of story?

    The crap YOU keep spewing did NOT come from Obama. That's al people are asking for.

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  21. Joe,

    I posted three links:

    factcheck, snopes, and fightthesmears

    The first two are independent sources, and the last one is OBAMA's own website.

    You didn't approve that comment from me. He HAS released his information and those three sites confirm it. So, if you don't believe your OWN eyes, or the word of the State of Hawai'i, then I don't know what to tell you.

    Otherwise, you want to just keep the controversy going by not posting my original comment with those three links. Which makes me think that you KNOW the evidence is out there, has been addressed, and you just want to act like an a$$hole with your head in the sand.

    So, now it is up to YOU to PROVE that Obama WASN'T born in the U.S. He has produced all of the necessary documents for proof, and the State of Hawai'i backs him up.

    Your move.

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  22. The child Barack Obama was born on a distant planet thousands of light years away, and when that planet was doomed to die, his parents sent baby Bar-Ob hurtling toward Earth in a tiny spacecraft.

    He landed in a Kansas cornfield, where he was raised by a white woman and her black husband. They didn't tell him until later in life that he was not of this Earth, but raised him as their own.

    The gangly child grew into a powerful orator, and he leaped the state Senate and then the U.S. Senate in a single bound, and his rise to fame was faster than a speeding bullet.

    He plays ball like Bird. He's got his own plane. Today, he's SUPER-OBAMA!

    But sadly, his spaceship came with no birth certificate.

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