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Friday, October 10, 2008

The Loss Of Cody Wilson

As most of you are aware, the Father of Cody Wilson who is grieving the death of his 14 year old, (only Son) asked that I post an article today.

One can only imagine what this kind of loss means to any Parent and for that I truly am sorry for your loss.

That being said, I spent a good part of today researching this accident and every single document involved in the case. The ONLY thing I did not review were actual photographs.

Look, the bottom line here, (IMHO) is that the driver truly made a mistake by taking his eyes off the road to change a CD. One of the tires on the vehicle was in fact under inflated and Cody was not wearing his seat belt.

The young man driving the vehicle admitted he smoked pot regularly but denied the use of any smoking that day. He had a wine cooler earlier that morning but nothing showed up in his system, NOTHING. I have the reports.

You know, when we're young, (especially kids today) we tend to make mistakes and sadly this is what happened. Should the driver have enforced this young man to wear his seat belt, yes. Should he have been paying better attention to the road, yes. With text messaging today on cell phones, believe me, this is only going to get worse.

However, after reading ALL of these reports and reading the reaction of this young man looking everywhere for his 14 year old passenger, it was very clear how painful this was. The situation is very sad but there was no real trace of pot being in this young man's system and there was no trace of alcohol being in his system either.

I contacted States Attorney Davis Ruark to discuss everything I had learned and he also felt horrible for the entire Family of Cody Wilson. Based on the information they had, there was nothing they could do to prosecute the driver. They checked elsewhere to see if there was anything they could look into and there's simply nothing there. As a matter of fact, most Counties would not have arrested and or indicted him as well. The Wicomico County States Attorneys Office did everything they could in this case.

From everything I have read, the driver was not "stoned" and sadly, in life, sometimes these kind of accidents happen. As I am sorry for the loss of this young man, trying to take another young mans freedom away and punish him and further than he already has been punished, (IMO) is not the answer.

Hopefully the driver has learned from this horrific accident and has given up recreational drug use and alcohol. If he has not, in time, things will catch up to him and perhaps the kind of punishment this Father wishes upon him will come to a reality, Until then, my hope is that this young man has learned his lesson and can grow from this accident. I can only hope the Father can find peace and eventually forgive this young man.

No laws need to be created for this particular situation. However, should someone have tested positive and there are no laws on the books protecting passengers similar to a DUI accident, something should be done.

This Blog is opinionated and after my own research into this matter it is my own opinion after researching the documents in this case. I am NOT a Judge but it doesn't take very long after reading such said documents what the outcome would have been in this case, not guilty.

Again, it's a sad situation and I am very sorry for your loss.

23 comments:

  1. This is the most unbiased piece you have ever written. Good for you Joe, digging up the facts and for showing the compassion you have in this post.

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  2. Thank you for doing the research, Joe. Those of us that already knew what really happened, appreciate you checking into the facts and that you have set the record straight.

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  3. I agree totally with anon 4:03. Thanks Joe!

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  4. The answers to the questions in a situation as tragic as this can only be found in your "mirror of life".

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  5. To know the whole story of what happened that day, and what an awesome and inspiring and beautiful person Cody was, and to read "HIS LEGACY", please go to one of his memorial websites and read the tribute called "THERE'S A REASON"... and while you're there, please be sure to read "HIS LEGACY"... thank you,
    Christina K Parker

    www.cody-wilson.memory-of.com

    And thank you Joe for taking the time to research this and get the facts before you posted and commented. Thank you so much....

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  6. I find that the down play of this tragidy is just another block in the cover up of my son's death. whoo-ray for the tainted press.I'll not bother you again and may God Bless You real good.

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  7. THANK YOU FOR POSTING THE TRUTH. I only have one other piece of truth to add. Sadly, Cody's father chose to raise him to NEVER WEAR A SEATBELT in spite of the laws requiring them. The fact is THIS is why Cody is no longer with us. If he had been wearing a seatbelt, he would more than likely still be alive. I am sorry that Ferrill's guilt (and desire for money) is so overwhelming that he has to waste his life doing everything he can to pretend that he had no responsibility for Cody's death. The truth is HE is the one responsible for Cody's death. Yes, there was an accident, but Cody's death is blood on his father's hands thanks to a lifetime of teaching him to NEVER WEAR A SEATBELT. (Just call me a close family member who knows the WHOLE truth.) Thank you for at least sharing the truth of the police/court reports. There's always more to the story....

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  8. I did warn you earlier to beg to have this removed. I told you that you would not like what you heard!!

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  9. Everyone reading this can be certain that the young driver will hold Cody's death close for the rest of his life. One of the cruelest lessons of youth is to be the driver in a car that a friend or friends die in and you are left alive.
    I had a close friend in high school to whom this happened and she has never been the same, and then an older friend of my kids had it happen to him, and he has paid an extremely high price.
    Both of these kids where exceptional students and had a very bright future ahead.
    While on the outside it seems that they went on with their lives, the inside is never the same.
    Knowing the two people that I described. I established a rule in my household about driving and that is that my children could not have anyone in their car other than their sibling until one year after they received their license.
    They hated every minute of that year, but when a similar think happened to one their friends they quickly understood that I was doing it for their own good.
    The truth of the matter is it takes a long time to become a good driver, and you just never know what is going to happen. Now with added gadgets to distract us it is only worse.
    This boy will mourn the rest of his life, and no amount of punishment that we inflict upon him here will compare to the self-inflicted he feels now and will feel forever.

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  10. I will not pass judgement but rather make a simple observation regarding drug testing after an accident or anytime for that matter.
    Unbeknownst to most people,you can test positive for marijuana up to 30 days or more after ingesting it,even if you do not smoke it regularly.Individual detection times vary widely and depend on the frequency of use,the amount used,the THC content,or potency of the drug and the users own metabolism.THC is stored in the fat cells of the body as it dissipates from your system,thus accounting for its extended detection time.
    In plain english,one does not have to be under the influence of marijuana just because it is present in the body via drug testing.
    Unfortunately,the more lethal and dangerous drugs such as cocaine and opioids,pass through the body rapidly,in a matter of hours after use,so someone who smokes crack or snorts some heroin on Friday night will test clean if they are tested for drugs on Monday.Alcohol also dissipates quickly,so if one tests positive for alcohol or hard drugs,they are probably still under the influence.All a positive for THC can tell you is that the individual smoked pot sometime in the previous month or weeks.Just wanted to mention that,because it is highly possible the young man in question was NOT impaired at the time of the accident.

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  11. I think that when you are the driver of a vehicle, you are responsible for the safety of everyone in that vehicle. It doesn't matter whether Cody's father "taught" his son not to wear a seatbelt; the driver should have told his passenger to buckle up or walk. I hope he has learned from this.

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  12. For obvious reasons, I want to be kept anon. I sat on the grand jury that heard this case. 23 of us heard this case and 23 of us were in tears afterwards. 23 of us chose that we didnt see any evidence of guilt. It was a sad, sad day for all in that room that day. I knew Cody since he was alittle boy and had the priviledge of instructing him. His father is a grieving man. Any one understands his anger. When someone you love is taken from you , it is only human nature to lash out for revenge. After all the facts were looked at and tears were shed , there was only one clear decision. It was an accident. Cody is missed by all who loved him.

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  13. it is accountability that is being over looked here. Weather it is intentional or a " accident " a person should be held responsible for what they have caused.Especially when it results in the death of some-one .What will stop this from happening again ? If all facters are reviewed,prior and after, there is no don't of the real fault.And I only hope that the next victem's family is more successful in holding the one responsible accountable for what they have done. Besides, what was the driver doing driving a un-safe vehicle in the first place.Any way, since Cody is dead now its the rest of you who are at risk from this driver now.Keep holding your breath, you might be lucky.I hope you are.And for your information, if its in your blood you are under its influrence .Don't pretend to know the lose of a child , if in fact you never lost one your self, it only shows your arrogance.Bottom line here is Cody was a victem and his assailent was not held responsible for what they did. Intentional or not .

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  14. Joe you say you seen all the reports, I think you must of missed a few facts that may have been omitted.But I do know the whole story and the one's responsibe, although not being held accountable, will be in God's time.Know this to be true as I do.So keep on living with your eyes closed , they will be opened one day.

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  15. Please let Cody rest!!!
    To continue to post, blog, and keep this going is "CRAZY"! All of us who knew and loved him HURT.
    All these things sound great, and I'm sure that Gurney is forever damaged from the part he played in Cody's death, my heart goes out to him. HOWEVER, please explain to me how a person, that is responsible for the death, can go out three days after the said fatality, and be stop again going 90 miles an hour in a 65 mile an hour rd our local bi pass? Then a few months later, get stop AGAIN in town on Civic Ave going 20 or more miles over the speed limit again???????
    WAKE UP!!!!! This last time according to the Maryand judiciary case search Gurney failed to appear, now what about his probation before judgement from the second traffic stop???? This was never put into place, it's now time for judgement..Don't you think?
    The system has failed again, and for this I feel that this is a horrible example that all of Cody's classmates, and all of our local citzens now see... It's alright to get in a vehicle, and do what you please. We have a college and some of these kids, NOT ALL, do what they please too, with the exeception of this last local bar fight they get away with terrizing the rest of the local community. If you end up in court with them as well, nothing is done about it either.
    I would have hoped all this would have an impact on our court system, along with this driver whom took a life. WAKE UP!!!!
    We are also paying your price, we hurt, we cry, we are awake at night, we visit a rock with Cody's face on it, with a prayer for ALL of our salvation, that burns to the core of our souls!
    There has not been a lesson learned for this young man still driving, even after THREE times of being sighted by the police! He is above the law! For this simple reason, this keeps going around and around!
    Not for Cody, he's gone forever, people if you knew him, he would never aprove of all this, nothing will ever bring him back, and surely this would embarrass him that others are acting this way.
    Everyone involved in this wants to point the finger at others and not take responsibility for the part they played in Cody's life! There were as many good times as bad. Cody had a great life, in in turn, this is how we repay him? Sadly to say the only person to tell the whole truth in this matter was GURNEY, THANK YOU for being honest to the best of your ability, the only request I would ask of you is to put down the car keys you are not responsible enough to drive. As long as you drive the way you are, no one is safe with you on the road.
    PLEASE STOP, PUTTING CODY'S DEATH AND LIFE OUT FOR OTHERS, HE DIDN'T DESERVE THIS.
    Please from this day forward if any comment go out reguarding Cody, PlEASE JUST SAY " HE WAS LOVED"........

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  16. Well, I wish I did know who of you were on that grand jury, because the court did allow the indictment of 'negligent homicide' and an arrest warrant was served, at MY home, where Gurn and Angela had lived (along with CODY), while I was at work. No less than a dozen state troopers surrounded MY HOME, to arrest Gurney. Do you have ANY clue how that must have made me feel?? And considering the fact they claimed to NOT KNOW that I was the 'victim's mother'... the trooper that remained in my shop with me while they looked for Gurn, was 'shocked'. As well he should have been, I have been Cody's SOLE CUSTODIAL PARENT HIS ENTIRE LIFE!! And he didn't even see or hear from his father (by HIS FATHER'S choice) for an entire YEAR prior to his death!!!

    Explain to me, how the state's attorney's office could get an indictment and arrest warrant when as you are now saying the grand jury of 23 people found him NOT GUILTY???? EXPLAIN THAT!!! Because I promptly went and bailed Gurney out of jail (before he ever even made it to 'jail') AND I hired a lawyer to represent him, which i paid for entirely out of Cody's life insurance money!! Because you know what?? THAT is what CODY would have wanted!! Cody loved Gurn like a brother!!! They WERE brothers for almost 4 years!!! They had spent the entire day together that day, laughing, cutting up, having a great time (as they had almost EVERY DAY over the years).

    They had gone to Gurn's house and talked about many personal things, like how some of Cody's friends had tried to get him to do drugs,and he had refused!! ( and YES, Cody was tested at the autopsy and it was completely and totally NEGATIVE).
    And how Cody REALLY wanted Gurn to come to know God and understand how much that meant to Cody... they talked about God a LOT that day, things that are too painful for Gurney to even tell me still.... you people have NO IDEA how hard this has been for him...

    And one thing that struck me to the core that maybe you people wouldn't 'get' is that Cody gave Gurn an 8X10 framed photo of himself and Angela from when they were little, and said to Gurn "You won't forget me will you??" THAT DAY!!! DO YOU GET IT?? DO YOU PEOPLE EVEN HAVE A CLUE????

    People can point fingers and sling mud all day long and it won't change the fact that Cody was a part of God's world, and God determines what happens and when, and if you don't understand that, then I pray for you every single stinking day! Why? Because I have to... that's my reason for still being here. I don't have a choice. God is more powerful than any of us, and it doesn't really matter what we want or don't want out of life. Cody knew that... by now, you should to!!

    Do you think for a minute Gurn set out that day to be in an accident and have Cody die?? If you do, if that thought has ever crossed your mind, then you are a damned, stupid fool.

    And as for the comment about the Explorer and the roll over factor, well, I, as the OWNER of that truck, did not KNOW that there was a rollover factor!! You want to know why I bought that truck in the first place? Because Cody and Angela ALWAYS had friends who wanted to go places together and do stuff together, like to the beach, to Six Flags, to ballgames, to parties, etc, etc, etc... and I bought that damned truck because it held SEVEN people and I had to have room for all their friends. And yeah, THEY would all wear seatbelts, but NO, Cody would not. It was some stupid sense of 'loyalty' to his father, who he LOVED, that made him chose not to wear a seatbelt ALL the time, even with his grandparents from his father's side, even with his friends, with EVERYONE, EXCEPT my mother! My mother was the ONLY person who insisted that Cody always wear a seatbelt. So I don't want to hear a bunch of crap about that anymore.

    And the only other thing I have to say about all this talk of drugs and so forth, is that if you knew his father's drug history, arrests, convictions, assaults on police, DUI's, restraining orders, etc, etc, etc, then you would KNOW how IRONIC this whole mud slinging, bunch of crap is!!! People need to get off their high horses and take a look at their own lives!! YOU have no clue how stupid you sound!!

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  17. I got off track and forgot to clarify the situation with the charges of 'negligent homicide'. Those charges were DROPPED by the state's attorney's office once it was admitted by the assisstant state's attorney that their office ONLY brought those charges against Gurney because Cody's father was harassing their office relentlessly.
    Our lawyer looked up the precident and sent the letter that showed that it is ILLEGAL to bring charges against someone simply to pacify or please another party. Don't think I didn't write to the ethics committee about that one, altho I never mailed the letter (YET), because I wanted to just 'let it go'. But at any rate, the charges were DROPPED because they HAD NO CASE!! NOT because Davis Ruark got a DUI!!! As Mr. Wilson would like you to believe!! Davis Ruark's DUI came MUCH LATER, long after the charges were dropped.

    So to keep the record true, Gurn was later charged with 'negligent driving' and 'failure to keep right of center'. He payed his fines before the court date and therefore did NOT have to appear.I wanted to fight it because I KNEW it was the father pushing for it, and because he wanted to use those charges as a basis for a civil suit, but our lawyer advised Gurn that the charge of 'negligent driving' would stick simply because he did NOT make Cody wear a seatbelt. Something that he will have to live with the rest of his life, knowing THAT is what caused Cody's death. We ALL live with that... the 'if onlys', and the 'should haves', 'would haves'... etc. You people have no clue what we go thru!!!!

    But I am here to tell you, Gurn did NOTHING that ANYONE ELSE WOULD HAVE OR COULD HAVE OR SHOULD HAVE DONE THAT DAY!!! NOTHING!!!!!!!!! I will go to my grave knowing that Gurn made the same mistake I would have made if I were driving that day!!!!!!! It definitely could have been me, it definitely could have been you!!!!!! So you people need to get over yourselves and until you go thru it yourself, you have NO CLUE!!!

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  18. Except drank a wine cooler that mourning ? I wouldn't do that or let him drive my vehicle.Was the cooler drank at your house ? I wonder ? I also wonder how you could defend the person who killed your son ? But thats for you to find peace with.When it is a fact that you knew of his illegal drug use prior to allowing him to use your defective vehicle. You should be counting your lucky stars that you were not indited for Cody's death your self Christina !

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  19. "Except drank a wine cooler that mourning? I would never do that or let him drive my vehicle." I would say you wouldn't, you'd be drinking all of them yourself and driving around yourself - to add to the long list of DUI's, hit and runs, drug charges and assaults on your record.

    "How could you defend the person that killed your son?" I happen to know, and understand, that he did NOT intentionally have that accident, he did not intentionally have Cody die. He did not 'kill' him. It's a FACT that there were many, many circumstances involved in that accident that were out of his control, such as the condition of the road, the type of vehicle they were in, and the reaction that millions of people have when in that situation.

    ANY state trooper will tell you that there IS an 'automatic' reaction by people to 'overcorrect' when a vehicle goes off onto the shoulder. And I myself have been there, and done that also. So I am fully aware of what he went thru that day. As well as thousands of people out there.

    He was NOT under the influence, he was NOT speeding, he DID NOT intentionally drift onto the shoulder, he DID NOT intentionally overcorrect, he DID NOT intentionally lose control. The culmination of circumstances are what brought about this accident. And his actions were not intentional, and I happen to know how terrible he feels for all of this. Neither you, nor 99% of you people out there, know him and know what is in his heart.

    Of course we can and will go thru life thinking of the 'what if's' and 'should haves', but I know in my heart that Gurn did nothing that I would not have done in that situation. And with that I have peace. Believe me, if he had been under the influence of anything, he would NOT have been driving. And if I had known that an SUV such as mine was a hazard, I would not have bought it. They don't tell you these things when you buy a vehicle.

    If they had been in a small car, and still left the road, and hit a tree or pole (as happens thousands of times each year), the same end result could have been.

    By not wearing a seatbelt, Cody was vulnerable. To this day, I know countless people (including EMT's) who don't wear seatbelts, because they have seen what being 'trapped' in a car can do to you. You know, you were told you were saved by NOT wearing one. So you can't judge the situation by that alone. It is a culmination of things that are out of our control. You don't KNOW when you get in a vehicle or when you are in an accident if THAT is the time you would have been better off with a seatbelt or not. You cannot predict that, you can't blame in the end, either way. Go back to the memory of site and read my tribute called "Reminder" for perfect examples of that.

    It wasn't intended, it wasn't planned, it just was. It was what it was, an accident. As one of my dear friends shared here, her son was wearing a seatbelt and driving 40 miles an hour,NOT under the influence of anything, and left the road and died. You cannot predict what will happen at any moment in time.

    I pray for you constantly, because that is what I have to do. I pray that you find peace, and I pray that you come to understand that God IS more powerful than you, me, Gurn, Cody, everyone on this earth. And He doesn't want us to live in hate and anger. He simply wants us to know how much He loves us. Enough to make the ultimate sacrifice. Cody believed in that, why can't you? If you did, you would understand what we understand and you would not be eaten up by hatred. Let Cody rest in peace.

    But if you feel the need to make money off of this loss, you should consider suing the county or state for the condition of the road, or sue Ford for the 'rollover factor' of the Explorer. Those two factors played more of a role in this accident than anything else combined. So maybe then you would be satisfied.

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  20. The fact is that you allowed a person who was not responsible enough to drive to drive and crash and kill our son.Millions of people ride up and down that very same road and they don't run off the road way ? Do you know why ? No it is not Gods will, but their own paying attention to what their doing.And because Gurny wasn't he should not be permitted to do so ever again.I only pray he is no where around here so that he dosn't "accidentally" kill anyone else that I love. You live a long and thoughtful life over what you have done , you deserve every day you get.

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  21. My sister, Cody's mother, has asked me to post a final comment from our family. We appreciate the support of others and we trust that the truth WILL come out, whether in this life or the next, as all of us are responsible for our own actions and choices. Time spent arguing here is wasted and you can't get that time back. Go do something productive. Make the world better for someone else rather than wasting time and energy here. Do something to honor Cody's memory rather than destroy it.

    Go home, hug your kids, tell your family and friends that you love them. It may be the last chance you get...

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  22. Anonymous said...
    First I want to appoligize if my comments offend others.I have not had the chance to share my side of what happened to Cody while the entire time his mother repeatedly slandered me.This is something I need to do so that I can have a way to except the injustice of my son's death.Thank you for you patience with me, as I have been with his mother.My goal is not to sling dirt around but to hopefully make it right that if a person who has illegal drugs in their blood, at the same time they cause a car wreck involving the death of anyone,be held responsible for their actions or lack of.And it must be a luxury to feel a person is not high when the illegal drug shows up in a blood test rather than to think them high.Momma said if it looks odd, more likly it is than not.If a tree falls and no one is around to hear it ,Did it make a sound ? If a person smokes dope and no one seen him do it,did they get high ? I hope you all realize this is not a vendetta out for Gurny but is a plea to See that this tragidy dosen't happen again with out the one responsible to not be held accountible for what they did.Why oppose the request for a" Cody Law" to enact a zero tolerence for illegal drug use while opperating a vehicle ? Would it cause those who know they have illegal drugs in their blood to be more cautious doing what their doing while illegal drugs may be present ? Is this a bad thing ? This is not just another law to have to obey but would promote less careless acts to be committed by those who insist on using illegal drugs.By causing those who use illegal drugs this extra concern , maybe all the extra worry would deter a person from the use of illegal drugs in the first place or cause them to be more attentitive while thet are driving. At least then it would remove the doubt of weather the person was impaired or just pure and simply a person who wasn't paying attention to what they were doing.In either case , when a death occurs due to someone's lack of responsibilty , that person should be held accountible for their actions. A accidental death defined by myself is if a plane falls from the sky and kills you ,Thats a accident.But if some one is neglectfull and causes a death then it is their responsibility. And they should be held accountible for their actions.I feel this should be true if a person is impaired or even if they are not.I don't understand how some one can be negligent and kill a person and not be found guilty of negligent homicide.Not negligent murder ? Dah. Homicide is the death of someone with out intent.Isn't this what those of you admitt Gurny committed.He didn't set out to kill Cody,we all agree on that. But because you may know him dosn't mean he didn't cause the death of my son.And shame on all who have sided for the person who was responsible for a death.It isn't that complicated to understand . What if it were your child ? Would you just say "oh well,my child is gone " NO I DON'T THINK SO . Or at the very least I would hope not.Because if this is the case , You don't deserve the child you have.So please explain to me why we shouldn't enact a Law to stop these careless crimes against others.I really do want to know ?

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  23. Joe I dont want to keep comming back here but It sometimes takes me a while to digest what I read.

    You first admit that the driver admitted to smoking pot dailey,then you later say that there was nothing in his blood.Hardly no traces of pot in his blood. I know you are not a fool so why do you beleive your readers are so?

    If pot can remain in your blood for 30 days and this guy admits to being a dailey user how then could there be hardly a trace?

    You have been kind enough to post this for me, but you have also been unfair to my son to also print these lies about the driver.

    If you read this , I want you to please take 5 min. to think about what youve written and if you realize you have been mistaken ,please print a blog saying so to all your blogging family.

    And lastly,if you feel something should be done,why not a law stateing that any illegal drug present in the blood stream that is conciously induced be found illegal.How is this wrong? Please e-mail me directly if you don't want this discussion to be public because I really want a intelligent answer from you .The guy killed my son.

    My e-mail is :ferrillwilson@comcast.net

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