Summer Classes for Men at THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER
REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED by Friday, July 2, 2008
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM
Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays-- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.
Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.
Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.
Class 5
Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
at 7:00 PM
Class 6
Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:0 0 PM
Class 7
Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.
Class 8
Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined
Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.
Class 11
Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM , location to be determined
Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at7:00 PM.
Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
Class 14
The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.
Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.
DelMarVa's Premier Source for News, Opinion, Analysis, and Human Interest Contact Publisher Joe Albero at alberobutzo@wmconnect.com or 410-430-5349
Thats cute? lol
ReplyDeleteThis type of post keeps me coming back to this site.
ReplyDeleteNow if we could only get these classes in reality, I know of at least 4 I could sign someone up for!
Wow - a lot of men could use these classes. And maybe even some women on SOME of those topics.
ReplyDeleteWhy do so many men say they WONT cook, WONT do dishes, WONT Vacumn, EtcETc? Some have NEVER even tried or else their MOMMY did EVERYTHING for them! They are not about to learn!
I admire the MEN who do these things (and more) ! A man can make the best COOK -
Joe, I don't know where your Adult Learning Center is, but it ain't big enough for the necessary enrollment!
ReplyDeleteI love it! Can I sign up my fiance...and brother....and dad?
ReplyDeletetoo funny!
Now if we could only get these classes in reality, I know of at least 4 I could sign someone up for!
ReplyDeleteMy mother started me on these classes years ago and my wife makes sure I keep up with continuing education.
This was obviously the idea of some control freak woman who only wants a man around to do HER bidding and kill the spiders. PUT THE F'N TOILET SEAT UP YOURSELF!!
ReplyDeleteThis is just what the Board of Education needs for the [No Child Left Behind] program.
ReplyDeleteI hope they can change the dates/times of some of the classes there are too many going concurrently in the Monday 7-9 timeframe and also on Tuesday. I can't attend 2 classes at the same time. :(
ReplyDeletei already do all these things for my wife and i cook good.
ReplyDelete